“Mutantism on the March”: Chapter 76 “The Jiber’s Infiltration Plans”

Jiber thought it was time to give his crew a talk and hand out some orders. He spoke to them under a grove of maple trees in a deserted part of the Montreal suburb Hudson. “Comrades. It is apparent that if one day we are to conquer Zortixia we require an army. We are aware that Zortixians will never welcome us with open arms but who likes taking their medicine? We will have to fight away to conquer those fools in Zortixia once and forever but we need recruits and that is the reason we are on Earth. Earthlings are dimwitted and slow but with them we shall fill our nets. They will be the backbone of our galactic army. Now I have instructed you to read Earthling history, sociology, art history and pornography etc. so that you would become well acquainted with their mannerisms and habits. It is time we put that knowledge to work. Our mission is to infiltrate all varieties or types of organizations and associations. We must determine the pulse of such groups. Blend in with them and curry their favour. They must accept and condone your thoughts. They must consider you as friends and leaders. Since many of you had high positions with The Opposite in Zortixia this infiltration and manipulation should not present you with great difficulties.

We should aim to brainwash, trick or force them into our ranks. We need a million or so of them. But knowing Canadian politics we must proceed with caution lest the federal government think some militaristic and separatist force is being trained to overthrow Canada. But then again that might work to our advantage as the Americans will think some threatening political and militaristic havoc is being fermented in Quebec and give the Yankees a reason to invade to “protect their interests”. Some of you will be sent to Washington to stir up some senile senators and public opinion that an invasion is warranted. It should not be difficult as the Yankees invaded Panama and a whole host of banana republics. If we are fortunate I plan to strike a bargain of some sort with the President of the United States. What bargain that will be I am still pondering. Perhaps we agree to deliver the entire province with its minerals and hydro electricity and in return we get exclusive rights over 50% of the population for our army and weapons from the Yankees with possible colonisation rights over a couple of planets in The Federation.

This is a mighty task but soon we will be feasting in the halls of the Legislative Assembly in Zortixia with the assembly members watching us with their heads on poles. The first white men of consequence in Quebec were the Frenchmen who were a brave lot and slaughtered aboriginals to prove it. Whomever they did not kill they subjugated them and stripped them of their culture and language. People after my own heart! But the aboriginals failed to completely conform so the Frenchmen imported more Frenchmen of the lowest order and wenches to increase the population. There were many impoverished nobles who were promised large tracts of land by their king to be worked by the paupers of France. The blackrobes of their church followed to spiritually subjugate the aboriginals and keep the French in line. So the foundations of the great French colony were laid until of course their great enemies, the British, thought they should own the same piece of real estate.”