Spoof News Services: The United States Bans the Sale of Canadian Maple Syrup: Washington: 17February2025

Posted byRobert K Stephen (CSW)Posted inCanadian serialized fiction., literatureTags:, , ,

Susan Malaka Secretary of Agriculture of the United States just fresh off a 16February2025 ban of Canadian Ice-wine announced today effective immediately the criminalization of the possession of and trafficking of Canadian maple syrup. American citizens may return any Canadian maple syrup in their possession under the terms of an amnesty also announced today by the Department of Homeland Paranoia.

Ms. Malaka, at a conference of New Golden Age corn farmers in Des Moines Iowa announced the criminalization of possession and even more severe penalties for trafficking of Canadian maple syrup. Malaka stated, “President Trump recently announced he expansion of the American oil and gas production with an inspiring DRILL BABY DRILL. I am following his footsteps and saying CORN SYRUP BABY! The prevalence of corn syrup in American food is making Americans obese and our pharma industry can only strengthen by letting Americans eat and fully enjoy food laced with corn syrup then reducing the resulting obesity with Uh Oh Ozempic!”

Published by Robert K Stephen (CSW)

Robert K Stephen writes about food ,drink, travel, film, and lifestyle issues. He also has published serialized novels "Life at Megacorp", "Virus # 26, "Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog" and "The Penniless Pensioner" Robert was the first associate member of the Wine Writers’ Circle of Canada. He also holds a Mindfulness Certification from the University of Leiden and the University of Toronto. Be it Spanish cured meat, dried fruit, BBQ, or recycled bamboo place mats, Robert endeavours to escape the mundane, which is why he has established this publication. His motto is, "Have Story, Will Write."

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