“Lost in Puppydom: Rory Dylan Stephen’s Puppydom”: AM I LIVING NATALIE IMBRUGLIA’S SONG “TORN”?

AM I LIVING NATALIE IMBRUGLIA’S SONG “TORN”?

Some of the lyrics in Natalie Imbruglia’s 1977 hit “Torn” read, “I’m cold, ashamed lying naked on the floor…”.

I endured my first grooming yesterday. Fay was telling me I was going to the doggie spa. Alright I thought, cucumber slices on my eyes, a manicure and some liver treats. That is not what happened!

A bath, which I detest and struggle like a mad hatter. Buzzing machines all over my body. And being placed in a cage after my grooming until Bob and Fay picked me up. Boy was I glad to see them!

What happened is I lost my identity. Shaved down to the skin. Matting. If only I had not given Bob such a hard time when he brushed me the shave down “a la USMC” might never have happened. I am very protective of my head and snout and gave the groomer a very difficult time.

I feel naked. I feel cold. I feel a bit ashamed of giving Bob such a hard time with his grooming attempts.

Gone is the cute looking Westie. I have received some comments saying I look like a Jack Russell Terrier but that reference to looking like a Chihuahua is BEYOND THE PALE! Another comment is that I looked some creature painted on the sarcophagus of an ancient Egyptian king!

I was so stressed out by the “doggie spa” I had three successive accidents in the house last night. I am ashamed of that too.

I need “grooming training” meaning a visit to the groomer every two months for a trim.

And I thought being a puppy was just having fun and getting scolded a few times a day for naughtiness. Think again Rory. Think again.