“Mutantism on the March” :Chapter 107 Mutant Killer Ants Terrorize Montreal

The fateful day dawned and the Jiber spent most of it guzzling Quebec apple cider and watching Johnny Jellybean repeats on CCF TV. After a dinner of grilled rabbit marinated in tarragon, mustard and yogurt with two bottles of cheap Spanish wine he wobbled out onto the street and hailed a taxi to take him to the headquarters of The Montreal Humane Society in NDG. He would show all these earthlings and stupid Zortixians just how brilliant he was. He picked the lock under the cover of darkness and found them smuggled out of North Korea by a defector….killer ants which were to be used by North Korean leader Conman Jugular Um to annihilate South Korea. The defector had been injured in an automobile “accident” as the reach of the North Koreans was long and the ants ended up at the Humane Society before they could be transported back to North Korea for their dastardly mission. It was a concerned physician caring for the North Korean defector that ensured the ants were taken to the Humane Society.

Jiber had had one of his agents steal a post graduate thesis from a chemical engineering student at Mc Swill University in Montreal involving the discovery of the B-17 formula that had the ability to enlarge certain insects to gargantuan size. If it works on the ants they would become Godzilla sized attackers. Hundreds of them and Jiber could subjugate the entire city of Montreal. Jiber spayed the ants with the B-17 and returned to his St. Leonard duplex to hear on the radio and television some 20,000 killer ants of gargantuan portion were attacking everything in their path including people, trees and pets. Jiber was convinced he would soon have a terrorized population under his control.

Dr. Zodiac comfortably ensconced in his luxury Ritz Marlton suite in Montreal had just finished his dinner of Greek sea bass and wild Greek herbs and was polishing off a bottle of Greek Moschofilero white wine when he thought he heard screams from Sherbrooke Street below his room. Most likely some guest had their television on a bit too loud. Zodiac was happy to be back on earth and in reality as opposed to some fantasy world of the Greek Gods in the Zlano dimension he was serving on many political committees and feeling he was making a valuable contribution to humanity in some manner instead of subsisting in some philosophical Neverland on Zlano. It was such a shame a deranged mayor called Droolpoop was spending so much money on the 1976 Olympics. Was he getting the money to construct facilities from Montreal mobsters so they could sell tainted horse meat at Olympic venues like they did at Expo 67 and skim some fat off city construction contracts? How the Olympic games had been perverted over the centuries. He remembered the first Olympics in Greece where he had presided as a judge. There was competitiveness and hostility but essentially they had been simple and dignified. Now they were huge showpieces creating superhumans through incessant training and doping while millions of humans wallowed in poverty and oppression. These disadvantaged needed help and quickly more than the tourism industry that could cater to the wealthy who could actually afford tickets to Olympic events. Zodiac spoke as an insider and not as a social worker who lived in the suburbs and travelled to the slums to help the disadvantaged. He worked free of charge in medical clinics of various Montreal neighbourhoods. Perhaps the screams were not emanating from a television set but from protestors demonstrating against the grandiose plans of Droolpoop.

Zodiac rushed to his window and looked below totally astonished to see a stream of huge ants invading Sherbrooke Street. He turned on his television and saw reporters in a state of near hysertia blurting out terrified accounts of hundreds being injured or killed by the mutant ants. Thousands of citizens lied moaning in the streets their blood full of the venom of these mutant ants. Zodiac racked his brains and remembered vaguely he had encountered something like this in his past but would it work here?

Published by Robert K Stephen (CSW)

Robert K Stephen writes about food and drink, travel, and lifestyle issues. He is one of the few non-national writers to be certified as a wine specialist by the Society of Wine Educators, in Washington, DC. Robert was the first associate member of the Wine Writers’ Circle of Canada. He also holds a Mindfulness Certification from the University of Leiden and the University of Toronto. Be it Spanish cured meat, dried fruit, BBQ, or recycled bamboo place mats, Robert endeavours to escape the mundane, which is why he has established this publication. His motto is, "Have Story, Will Write."

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