On the Ledge Part 6: “Truth in the Vine”: Cheating the Chumps!

Lolita Wine Services was raking in the money with its “enhanced” Malbec “Confusion” which of course was Algerian plonk with added brown sugar. Residents of Canada were carting it off by the caseload. But as I understand capitalism as a commie one can dupe the masses for an enormous profit and In East Germany we duped them to stay in power and line our pockets.

So the next level was to have Lolita Wine Services offer rating services for wine for a fee by creating “Truth in the Vine All The Time”. Our “accredited wine writers” would review wines and publish them so consumers would get an “honest” appraisal of wines from Lolita Wine Services. At $40 a bottle this “slight administrative fee” could earn us hundreds of thousands of dollars. Of course, with so many unpaid internet wannabe wine critics we could recruit “impartial” reviewers. These minor “administrative fees” could quickly add up! And our “impartial critics” could be rented out for wine tasting events. Our estimates of revenue from these “slight administrative fees” were calculated by our accountants at $1.87 million a year. We would pay our internet writers with left over samples. Like scrabbling beggars fighting for a few coins.

To hell with those ethical types who said we were corrupted by the fact we were charging to review wines! We were not charging but only for the purposes of recovering our expenses. Our “impartial” reviewers were just that. Well irrespective of giving them a little bonus if their 90 point rated wines surpassed our sales targets for that wine. Wine is a dirty capitalist business. Get used to it. There is no better capitalist than a communist! Just look at China!

Published by Robert K Stephen (CSW)

Robert K Stephen writes about food and drink, travel, and lifestyle issues. He is one of the few non-national writers to be certified as a wine specialist by the Society of Wine Educators, in Washington, DC. Robert was the first associate member of the Wine Writers’ Circle of Canada. He also holds a Mindfulness Certification from the University of Leiden and the University of Toronto. Be it Spanish cured meat, dried fruit, BBQ, or recycled bamboo place mats, Robert endeavours to escape the mundane, which is why he has established this publication. His motto is, "Have Story, Will Write."

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