King Charles III Launches Out at President Trump Over Canada Threats: Commonwealth Members Will Attack to Defend Canada: Newcastle Upon Brine: 13March2025: Spoof News Services

King Charles launched out at President Trump of the United States this afternoon in a televised statement broadcast on both the BBC and CBC.

Speculation is Charles has been humbled by Canadians referring to him as “Bonnie Chicken Charlie” for exhibiting silence of cowardice, relying on the shield of diplomacy, against the continual threats of President Trump and his minions to physically annex Canada after its economic destruction by “those beautiful tariffs”.

King Charles statement is as follows; “Good afternoon most loyal subjects. Canada has been threatened by numerous threats of President Donald Trump and his gang of brash, crude and highly lippy bullies.

These statements constitute not only a low brow threat to Canadians but an insult to my royalness and to the Commonwealth grouping of 56 states an international force to be reckoned with.

Attack one member Donald and we retaliate and we don’t mean prohibiting imports of American watery beer and that vile bourbon. Angry kilted men are a force to be reckoned with particularly with those bagpipes a blaring.

My seriousness about this schoolyard bullying has prompted me to make a personal donation of 16 Harrier jets, currently decommissioned by the Royal Airforce, to member state Botswana. We have a few used tanks we will include. I have asked all member states in Africa and Asia to increase their defence budget by 237,000 British Pounds.

As you know, or most likely don’t know as shown by your misunderstanding and manipulation of the 1908 Treaty between Canada and the United States, the Treaty of Paris signed between The United States and Britain in 1793 established boundaries at a whim. Some Yank simply took a ruler and cut off our colonies from the mothership, England. Remove that carve out of the United States and by God what a beautiful commonwealth we would have. Just imagine instead of your population bowing at the feet of actors, hip hoppers and overpaid athletes they could admire a real king! Donald you rule by a dubious set of executive orders. I rule by divine order. You have been warned and I am sure your citizens will be happier being a member of the Commonwealth!”