OFFICIAL TRANSCRIPT OF PRIME MINISTER LAWRENCE WONG’S PRESS CONFERENCE CONCERNING THE RESCUE OF RORY D. STEPHEN
From the office of Lawrence Wong Prime Minister of The Republic of Singapore
Good afternoon to members of the press.
Two days ago the Singapore Police Force (SPF) executed a search warrant at the residence of Melanie Lau of 6000ABV Orchard Road.
Rory D. Stephen, a West Highland Terrier, was found on the premises unharmed and in good spirits although a bit overweight perhaps attributable to several bowls of half consumed Singaporean Chicken and numerous wrappers from consumed Peranakan rice gluten pastries seized as evidence.
Rory is sitting to my left napping and snoring slightly.
A tip on the nose to tip of his carrot tail examination by veterinarian experts has given Rory a clean bill of health although there may have been abuse by his abductors thought to have silenced him by shouting and kicking his cage during his transport to Singapore and threatening to send him to Cambodia to be a landmine sniffer.
Ms. Lau is currently in detention and under interrogation by the SPF. Preliminary reports are that Ms. Lau did not participate in the abduction but may have been involved in a conspiracy to do so. Further details will be forthcoming from the SPF.
Although Rory was brought to safety by the matta-matta of the SPF the contributions of The Constabulary of North Bergen New Jersey, The Hong Kong Society Against Canine Trafficking and certain employees of Cathay Pacific Airlines must be noted and complimented.
The Government of the Republic of Singapore continues to work with international law enforcement agencies to combat canine smuggling in Southeast Asia.
Rory D. Stephen will be staying with me and my family until such time as his master Bob arrives in Singapore to collect his Westie and be an official guest of the Republic of Singapore. I will be presenting Rory with Pingat Jasa Berani (Medal of Valour) for his courageous acts in the next few days.
Rory will be relating his story to the Singapore Times in the upcoming days.
Thank you for attending this press conference and I remind members of the foreign press from throwing masticated gum wads on our streets!
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