THE ABDUCTION OF RORY DYLAN STEPHEN: TIME TO GROW UP PUPPY!
The Singapore Times Exclusive: TIME TO GROW UP PUPPY! AGAIN IT’S MADAME FONG!
I haven’t been on this earth for long. About eight months. Everything was happy and joyful except for a scolding or two.
Humans and dogs it was jump up, lick noses and have a jumpy and wonderful time. Compliments about how adorable and cute I was.
It is dawning on me as I lay in a crate in Cathay Pacific’s Boeing Dreamliner cargo hold something is very wrong. I am accustomed to the roar and the funny smelling chilly air but I have been in a crate the entire 23-hour trip and I have peed on myself. I am starving and parched and feeling dizzy.
Having my crate kicked and threats of being in some mainland China restaurant served as a hot dog plate or being used as a landmine sniffer in Cambodia and then being urinated on in the baggage transfer area by an evil baggage handler in Hong Kong was the straw that broke the Westie’s back. Yes, that man in Hong Kong was evil. But I was to, learn there is far more good than evil in Hong Kong There have been nothing but evil people involved in my “trip” which I finally realized was an ABDUCTION! Like that Getty guy Fay told me kidnapped in Rome years ago. I’ll fight like hell before they cut off my ear!
Where are Bob and Fay? They will be here any moment? If I weren’t so hungry, miserable and terrified I would be howling in misery and sadness.
All humans are obviously not like those in Toronto I met on my walks. I didn’t realize how wonderful my life was. I took it for granted.
Bob had told me I would be a puppy for a year. Well, I am beginning to think it has ended and how will I escape this predicament?
I passed out in the cargo hold and wake up in the oversize baggage area at Singapore Changi Airport.
And who is there dressed in vintage Pierre Balmain waiting for me? Madame Fong from the Family Noodle Restaurant (and subterranean opium den) on Toronto’s Spadina Avenue.
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