“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” : The Final Cut: Reggie, Bosco and Dillie the Westie Groove at Drake’s Album Release Party: The Dogs Dig into Shrimp and Grits: Penny’s Bloodcurdling Barking! LOCKDOWN! Chapter Thirty Five (35)

All us dogs, Bob and Fay are eagerly anticipating Drake’s big barbeque at his Park Lane home in the Bridle Path in a very exclusive part of Toronto. How kind of Drake to invite us. What are neighbors for!  Unfortunately, this is the neighborhood where the Sherman’s were murdered! Honey and Barry Sherman pharma billionaires that must have made enemies.

Bob had downloaded a passle of Drake’s songs and really none of us dogs and Bob can stand his music with its nasal whining that gives sensitive dogs with precision hearing a headache! Fay thinks Drake is the best. Hey but dogs getting invited to a BBQ means MEAT POSSIBILITIES!

Not to boast but because of the Disney Film “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” all of us are celebrities except Bosco but being a part of the family (hopefully temporarily) so he is invited.

So we gussy up, casually of course, with Bob and Fay in Armani and Boss and us pooches just bathed by Bob and smelling pretty. Even stinky Bosco smells half decent with fancy doggie eau de cologne! Dr. Murray said no baths for Bosco for two weeks so his leg can fully heal.

We walk to our next-door neighbour passing through Drake’s security detail. Bob parts with his Glock but with such heavy security we all feel safe. Bosco as a new temporary addition to the family really has no inclination about our fame. As a precaution we have Kit Kat at the door with Drake’s security team from Shark Security. Man, those guys are at least 300 pounds each!

Drake greets us and I was expecting to see some man with heavy gold chains, sunglasses, floppy clothes surrounded by voluptuous women with big butts like in his music videos. But he is attired in jeans and a flashy jacket. He is a shy guy. He picks me and Dillie up like he is specially greeting animal stars. He asks his posse to give each of us 24 karat gold water bowls. They are filled with my favourite Evian water. We are the only dogs here! Drake introduces us while he is holding us to so and so. Some are musicians, artists and actors. Some are huge basketball players. I can’t say I like Drake’s music but as a human he is gracious, respectful, and humble. What a good egg of a neighbour.

And my goodness there is a classical music trio from Toronto Consort playing some medieval music from a man called Monteverdi! This Drake plays tough but he is ultra cool. He is serving all sorts of drinks including a favourite of his which is frozen honeydew melon, mint, lime juice, Evian water and Ouzo.  The guests loved this odd cocktail so much the Ouzo ran out so they are drinking some Champagne in a golden coloured bottle. “Kristal”?

Gordon Lightfoot is at the festivities as well and he takes a liking to Bosco. Perhaps if he knew how Bosco stinks he might not be so friendly! Bosco seems to have found a long-lost friend in Gordon Lightfoot. They are getting along like fire and smoke!

In this boisterous environment there are only happy people. Many are black and I have not seen many of these types of humans but they are so friendly so who cares about their skin colour. Dogs don’t discriminate.

There are a few lambs and pigs roasting over a spit and dinner is announced. There are huge mounds of meat, polenta, salad, grits with shrimp and loads of other food. Guests are given a Limoges China plate and they hit the buffet. There are great wines from Campania in Italy and the Okanagan in British Columbia. Drake proudly pours some Meyer Family Vineyards Chardonnay and Pinot Noir much better than those Reggie and The Tramp TCM wines.

Drake asks Bob if it is OK if we canines can have some meat. YES!!!!! We can. Just a bit of pork and lamb with some grits and shrimp. Kick me. Am I in paradise?

We gobble up this very special tasting meat and almost stagger over to Gordon Lightfoot and crash out with exhaustion and a full belly at his feet. Man, this Drake knows how to throw a party.

We are prodded awake by Bob who says it is time to go home just down the street. Before we go Drake says he would like to take us to a basketball game of a team called the Toronto Raptors where we will be guests of honour on national television!

Drake has Bob’s Glock returned to him and has his security detail walk us home. Gordon Lightfoot asks us if he can have Bosco overnight and Bob and Fay agree. What’s up?

Despite the fact I do not like Drake’s music he is a good soul and is our friend now. Bob and Fay have asked him over for dinner next week.

We are home as the sun rises and we crash out with our 24 karat gold water bowls Drake has given us! What a night. I am too tired to say my nighttime prayers. But before I nod off I think I see Anwar smiling at me and saying “Bravo Reggie!”

But before we drift off we hear Penny’s frantic if not bloodcurdling bark over our sound system. Mr. Antonio is running into the house shouting “LOCKDOWN”! Something very awful must be happening. As we head to the safe room we hear two explosions outside many windows in the house are blown out.

The bang bang of Mr. Antonio’s Dirty Harry Edition 357 Magnum is heard and Kit Kat sounds like he in attack mode. Screams are heard.

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” : The Final Cut: Bosco The Arrogant Snob! Off to a Barbeque at Drakes: We Meet Gordon Lightfoot: Ollie Smells Extreme Danger! Chapter Thirty Four (34)

It was only a few days after arriving back from Los Angeles when the “Bosco Incident” occurred. Fay had a long Zoom call with a book publisher who was interested in discussing her planned book “Our Life With Dillie The Westie” and requiring absolute quiet for the call Bob took Dillie The Westie and I for a walk on the Wilket Trail near Edwards Gardens, Toronto’s botanical gardens. It was a long walk and Dillie required a few rests and was limping by the time we returned home. My poor brother has a bit of a problem with arthritis but being a brave trooper and too proud ever to admit to discomfort and pain he tries his best to act years younger than he is. The true spirit of a West Highland Terrier.

Well Fay greets us with a funny smile on her face and says that we have had “an incident” in the backyard. Not listening but reacting with ferocity Bob pulls out his pistol a Glock and is prepared for a shootout with the “The Brothers of the Correct and Only Islam”. Bob rushes out to the backyard expecting to see his security detail shredded by a suicide bomber but almost trips over a dog on a leash! He laughs and says what has fate brought us this time! I wonder where Bob got the Glock.

The somewhat smelly Bosco

It is a sad looking dog of mixed breed Fay found outside the gates of Drake’s house. We know Drake and ask his security detail if he can come out and talk with us. And he comes out with a few of his friends from a basketball team called the Toronto Raptors. I am not sure what basketball is but Bob tells us Drake loves it. We ask him if this is a dog he knows and he says no. But he asks us if we want to join him for a BBQ in his backyard that night and we say yes. He says don’t forget to bring Dillie and me. He suggests we check with Gordon Lightfoot next door but Lightfoot did not recognize the dog. Mr. Lightfoot asks us to come over for high tea in a few days and gives us his telephone number.

The dog is small and cute but what breed no one can guess. Perhaps a bit of this and that? One of his legs has been shaved for an intravenous feed and there are stitches in it. Bob phones Toronto Animal Control and they have no record of a missing dog meeting Bosco’s description. It’s Labour Day so we will take it to Dr. Murray at the animal hospital on Tuesday to see if it has a microchip. He has no tags or identification of any sort.

Bosco, as we call this dog, is about the same size as Dillie and I and initially he greets us with joy but when we approach his face for a sniff as all dogs do he rudely responds with a low growl. Bob and Fay are not appreciative of that. When Bob takes us for a walk he does that same growl to other dogs that come for a friendly sniff. We will have to wait to take him to Dr. Murray to see if he has a chip and we do so but he has none. A dog without any identity. Foolish owners unless this was an intentional abandonment. Bob leaves his number with Toronto Animal Control but there are no owners looking for this dog.

For the time being we call him Bosco. I give him a serious talking to and warn him to wise up or he will end up in an animal control shelter and based on my experience in Cairo my realism terrifies this little snobby dog thinking he was a purebred and that he was above me. He no longer acts as a king in the house and respects his junior position in the family. He is no Karim and I just can’t feel like we are the rat pack like it was with Karim but I say to Dillie lets give him some time and the wise Westie Dillie agrees.

Bob can’t bear to hand him over to a barren animal shelter a cruel and forbidding place. Bosco soon begins to realize how lucky he is and becomes humbler and more respectful. As far as I am concerned Dillie is the king in this family and Bosco is third place here and lucky to be that! He kind of stinks but Dr. Murray says wait a couple of weeks until he heals completely to give him a bath. At least his hair was not matted and covered with fleas like me in Cairo before I was rescued.

Ollie is acting worried. He smells something he can’t identify other than telling Dillie and I it smells like danger.

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog”: The Final Cut: “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” Changes Our Lives: Reggie Close to Issuing a Fatwah! Reggie and The Tramp Wines: Chapter Thirty Three (33)

Bob is no longer an obscure author now being in high demand. At least twice weekly he is on North American talk shows with me and Dillie the Westie at his side. He is the darling of “The View” and on CNN as a co-host with some guy Fareed on the series “Islam in Crisis”. When In New York he is frequently seen with Gail and Oprah over a bowl of mussels at “Gabriels”. He plays squash and pumps weights with Marc Consuelo. I have been a frequent guest of Kelly on her talk show and it is rumoured my numerous appearances there were the reason that Kelly finally won her Emmy. Bob’s previous books “Virus # 26,”, “Mutantism on the March” and “Life at Up Up And Away Investment Management International”, “On The Ledge With The Riesling Liberation Front”, “Andrij The Ukrainian Rescue Dog”, “The Penniless Pensioner” and “Travels to a Different Time “  which were published in a serialized format on the internet on his blog “A Little Birdie Told Me”, have been published by Big House Publishers in New York and all are in the top ten of the New York Times best seller list. He is writing a screenplay for ABC about “Bosco the Stinky Rescue Dog” based on the pitch for a series ABC originally wanted to produce about my life. Disney has entered a merchandising contract with Turner Classic Movies for a series of wines called “Reggie and the Tramp” and Bob receives a 10% cut of gross revenues from sales of what he refers to as a “middling wine” which is better that a “widdling wine”.

Bob has said to Fay we have more money than we know how to deal with so they have decided to donate 25% of all net revenues received from the Disney Film “Regie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” to the rescue society that brought me from Cairo to Toronto provided Fay obtains a seat on their Board of Directors. Yep that is the democratic nature of Canadian charities. A Toronto hospital wants to name a wing “Reggie and Dillie Brain Trauma Centre”. All Bob is required to do is fork over $40,000,000 each year for three years.

But Bob’s success with my story has caused problems. Due to his wealth, popularity and the death threat by the “The Brothers of the Correct and Only Islam” we have had to move to a swanky new house in the exclusive Bridle Path neighbourhood of Toronto becoming neighbours with singers Drake and Gordon Lightfoot. We have high walls around our house and a security detail outside our entrance gate. When Dillie and I go for walks there is a security guard armed to the teeth that walks with us. We are becoming somewhat accustomed to it but I think we have lost much of our freedom. For the time being I am not allowed off leash. Dillie and I feel we are in a bit of a medium security prison but this may be the price we pay for being famous. Bob and Fay gave their old house to their son Drew on the condition he mind me and Dillie when Bob and Fay go on vacation or business trips. Vacations are but a dream for Bob now considering the death threat on his head. The Muslim Association of Canada has issued a press release saying there is no blasphemy in a dog praying to Allah saying that all creatures big and small have a spiritual side to their being. They also welcomed the movie saying it was an opportune time to have a Muslim dog the hero of a story and an inspiration to all children irrespective of their religion. Even the hardline clerical government of Iran has permitted “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” film to be distributed in Iran in anticipation the film will germinate better understanding and reactions amongst Iran and the United States. This movie is far bigger than anyone thought. There are rumours that Bob may receive the Nobel Peace Prize for literature! I am supposed to not say anything to anyone but Bob will be receiving the Order of Canada in a few months for his book “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” for fostering a better understanding between Canadian Muslims and the rest of the population of Canada. Bob and Fay have also made sizeable contributions to Canadian First Nations groups to improve water quality in their communities. Is everyone your friend when you have so much dough?

Can “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” change the face of Iranian American Relations. The big guy is thinking about that.

What has not changed is the love and care Dillie the Westie and I receive from Bob and Fay. What more could any dog want except perhaps for chunks of cheese that “accidentally” fall on the floor or pieces of meat that mysteriously end up in our bowls from time to time! We dogs are food centric!

All this is quite an achievement for a lowly street dog on the edge of a miserable death on the streets of Cairo. And I say proudly and without reservation in my nightly prayers I give sincere thanks to Allah for all that he has done for me so there “The Brothers of the Correct and Only Islam” stick THAT UP YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT! You dare touch Bob I will return to Egypt and lead a pack of street dogs and hunt you down. I may have a comfortable life but you will see I have not lost my street fighting spirit! Consider yourself lucky for the time being that I can restrain Penny, Ollie and Kit Kat from paying you a visit. The Mookster having all his intelligence community contacts is inching closer to flushing out your location. Consider this a death threat Brothers! Try anything and every dog in Cairo will obey a Reggie fatwah! Mr. Antonio has advised us he and Kit Kat are training a pack of the meanest dogs in Portugal to be ready for an attack in Cairo if need be. He has called them the “Dirty Dozen”.

Reggie’s message to the Brothers of the Correct and Only Islam

Travels to a Different Time: Travels of My Mother: 23June1971: Rhodos, Greece: The Runny Nosed Baker

Dear Andy:

We are staying at the Pearl Hotel in Rhodes. Newly opened with a big balcony and $4 a night. Add on another $5 a day for food we are living like royalty for under $10 a day. It is very hot here but almost always a cooling breeze. It is cool in the evening and until 10 a.m. and then it starts heating up. In the middle of the day you feel if you go out in this heat you will conk out. People rest here from noon until about 4 p.m. All the restaurants are outdoors except in the big hotels and I do not care for them. There are many places you can stay on the island for under $2 a night with breakfast included. We are going to a nearby island called Symi for a few days then back here for awhile. The temperature in Athens these days is over 105 degrees so no way I would like to stay there. Many young kids here with sleeping bags sleeping on the decks of the ship on overnight trips. It took us 22 hours on the ship to get here on The Knossos. These kids eat bread and fruit and if we had sleeping bags we would do the same.

Each morning we visit a local bakery and we buy hot rolls and have them with fruit and jam. We know the baker now so he smiles at us. He has a perpetually runny nose!

Love Mum

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog”: The Final Cut: The World Premiere of “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog”; Chapter Thirty Two (32)

Bob, Fay and Dillie accompany me to Los Angeles flying on a Disney private jet for the world premiere of “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog”. We are staying in a huge Beverly Hills mansion provided to us by Disney but all promotional interviews will be at The Ritz-Carlton Los Angeles. Security is heavy as Bob has received death threats from an Egyptian terrorist group “The Brothers of the Correct and Only Islam” upset at the portrayal of Egyptian society in the Disney film and furious that a filthy cur Reggie prays to Allah which they call blasphemy. These are the type of small-minded men (women are not permitted to join) that arrested and executed my original master Anwar for writing articles critical of the Egyptian government. Hateful. Narrow minded and fanatical they are dangerous lunatics. Dogs are seen as playthings of the infidels. Most street dogs in Cairo have more morals and decency than these self-appointed guardians of the faith. In this world crazy politics and ideologies some humans make me proud to be a dog but then again there are so many kind humans that helped me Egypt so I must not forget that and Bob made that very clear when writing the screenplay.

Our Beverly Hills Mansion

Ollie will be bomb sniffing at The Ritz Carlton Los Angeles as part of a special FBI team. The Mookster is liaising with his political and counter-intelligence contacts for social media chatter. Kit Kat will be closely surveying guests to determine if in his experience any don’t “fit in”. Penny will be in the in the interview suite at The Ritz-Carlton Los Angeles hiding in a wheely basket ready to attack intruders. Mr. Antonio will be driving us in a steel reinforced Mercedes van brought over from Lisbon and packing his World War Two Luger and a special Dirty Harry Edition 357 Magnum. This is very tense indeed.

As a result of the death threat Bob and Fay have had to sell their house and move to the Bridle Path area in Toronto. Our new house is massive and well fortified and will be manned by private security. We have a famous musician on our new street called Drake who I have heard much about on the BBC show “Entertainment” and another older musician called Gordon Lightfoot who I know nothing about other than he his loved by many Canadian Boomers.

Bob, Fay, Dillie the Westie and I attend promotional interviews with the crew that worked on the film and the actors that are doing the voice overs. Cameras are popping and questions galore!  I recognize the anchor from BBC America News and romp up to her and give a friendly bark and she pats me Reggie the former street dog, on the head and gives me a little hug! Anwar, a BBC devotee, would be so pleased and proud! Then that dainty and well chiselled news anchor from ABC news I see following the BBC news every night gives my head a firm ruffle! Dillie has a big smile on his face like when he goes off-leash. He gets lots of comments how cute and sweet he is and boy he is all groomed and looks like the sharpest and coolest Westie. Why do those BBC people insist upon calling him “Dylan” and me “Reginald” (like I am some butler) ?

The interviewers ask Bob if he is fearful about his safety considering the death threats from the “The Brothers of the Correct and Only Islam”. He replies that he is but no one could have foreseen the idiocy of such a group. Bob says the film is a family feature but it has a deeper meaning describing the plight of street dogs of Egypt and the special people there and in Canada that are doing all they can to stop the poisoning and killing of so many dogs in governmentally encouraged culls. Bob says he means no disrespect to Egyptians and Islam by his story but those “Egyptian experiences” have changed so many lives. And he hopes it will change millions more.

It has been a very long day and dinner is served to us at our Beverly Hills temporary home. We sit and eat by the television and there is yet another story of a black person being gunned down by a white policeman. There is not only madness on the streets of Cairo but on the streets of the United States! Mr. Antonio patrols the perimeter of the mansion and Penny has completed a sweep of the neighborhood in her Oodlecopter.

Bob takes Dillie and I for a walk on the grounds of the gated mansion and we are so tired we all head back to bed as tomorrow night is the world premiere of “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog”!

Morning comes strangely to both dogs and humans who are bound by circadian rhythms. We are up at 7 a.m. Toronto time which is 4 a.m. L.A. time as Dillie the Westie barks to go out and pee and tired Bob lumbers down to take my ageing pal out and me too to keep Dillie company. Bladders and brains are all mixed up! But we do our business and every human and dog sleeps until 10 a.m. and we are wide awake.

Bob and Fay head downstairs and give us dogs a hug and kind words. And Carmela an older Mexican lady has prepared Mexican homemade dog food for Dillie and I with pork and black beans and it is like nothing we have eaten before. We wag our tails and ask for more with a gentle bark and Carmela obliges. OMG so good and different. The black beans give us some gas but not the runs….thank goodness. Bob and Fay have Huevos Rancheros and tortillas and a big pot of coffee. Penny has her customary enoki mushroom omelette and organic sourdough bread.

We spend the morning by the pool with Bob throwing us balls until we are panting and too tired to continue. At 2 p.m. Carmela prepares a Mexican feast of epic proportions for the humans. And the canine crowd enthusiastically chomps down on special homemade Mexican dogfood feast with pork and chicken without any beans. Bob and Fay have a drink called Cuba Libres.

The grounds at our Beverly Hills mansion

At 4 p.m. we gussy ourselves up to attend the premiere. As dogs running and playing we are smelling very doggy and receive a quick bath by “dog trainers”. We are primed and ready to go and we head off to a big theatre in LA with Mr. Antonio driving his blast proof Mercedes van and his pistols on the front seat. There is a red carpet and for security reasons we appear for only 15 minutes on the carpet and go to the “Green Room” to prepare the film to roll. Kit Kat has been heading our security team keeping a close eye on the invitees and Ollie has been sniffing for explosives. Thery give us an all clear to take our seats in the theatre when we are ready but first backstage we meet many big Hollywood stars. Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson pick me up and as Rita and Tom are Greek Orthodox like Fay they say come visit us in Greece on our island. Our jet is at your disposal Tom says to Bob.

The finest Portuguese sparkling wines served for après film party

There are famous people all over. The film runs and there is quiet then standing ovations explode for half an hour. Dillie and I are picked up by Bob and Fay and shown to the audience and the crowd goes wild.

Indications are as we read the critics’ reviews in the L.A. papers next morning this is the Disney hit of the century. No ever!!!!

The cast party was a dream after the screening for anyone in the Hollywood National Enquirer sphere. We should mention who did the voice overs of our characters in this animated production who were all in attendance;

Reggie:  Rick Mercer

Karim: Riz Ahmed

Bob: Rylan Gosling

Fay: Jennifer Aniston

Dillie the Westie: Peter Mansbridge

Anwar: Eduardo San Juan Breña 

Narrator: Mahershala Ali

Ollie: Mathew Broderick

Kit Kat: Cary Grant (AI generated)

The Mookster: Jimmy Stewart (AI generated)

Penny: Talyor Swift

The party was a “wrap” at 4 a.m. and returning home in our Mercedes Van Bob receives a call from the CEO of Disney that “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” is charting as a monstrous hit. I am glad for this. But can I fathom what this means for our lives? As for immediate realities Dillie and I are exhausted and have no energy for a walk but to be put outside for a long pee and bed is all we want!

“Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” :The Final Cut: The Making of Disney’s “Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog”: The Terrifying Stink of Cairo: This Will Not Be a “Lady and the Tramp Story!: Chapter Thirty One (31)

The contracts with Disney have been signed. Bob as co-producer and screenplay writer is in Los Angeles Monday-Friday at Disney Studios working on the Disney animated film “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” production. Dillie the Westie and I miss him and the walks he took us on in the neighborhood. Fay is more likely to put us out in the backyard which we enjoy but we love catching up with our circle of canine friends and leaving our pea mail to mark our territory. I spend most days training our security team The Mookster, Ollie, Penny and Kit Kat.

Bob returns for the weekends frazzled from the 5-hour flight from Los Angeles to Toronto and the three hour time difference. But we benefit from “guaranteed walks” at the local golf course! It is late autumn and the golf course is closed so we can run around off leash chasing birds and squirrels with Bob keeping on high alert for coyotes. Many rescue dogs, not me, are bolters as they specialize as escape artists from humans who have treated them so badly. In fact, some 90% of dogs reported missing in Toronto are rescue dogs. I could be mean and say what silly dogs they are not knowing how lucky they are to be under the care of masters and mistresses but frequently many dogs are guided by instinct and the instinct of a street dog in Egypt is to escape from humans who cause so much canine suffering. Instinct rarely knows logic.

Bob has written my story but wanting to visit Cairo to speak with rescue societies and animal activists about the life of street dogs in Cairo he spent some two weeks there learning how accurate his fictional portrayal of some of my life was. He was quite accurate say the Egyptians his time there allowing him to fine tune the screenplay. When he returned to Toronto I could smell the stink of Cairo on his jacket and his skin terrifying me so much so I started shaking and hid under the bed upstairs. My mind has been scarred by my time there but I know my story is about the story of many street dogs in Cairo and Alexandria. My story must be told!

Bob told Fay about the “nightly firecrackers” and cheering in Cairo. In a shaky voice tinged with rage and shame he explained that these were not firecrackers but rather soldiers shooting street dogs and barbaric Egyptians celebrating the death of each animal. I hate these barbaric Egyptians but Bob reminds me I survived and came to Canada because of a small group of caring Egyptians like the policeman that brought me to the animal hospital after the Rottenwhiler took a chunk out of my leg.  And the dedicated animal doctors that rely on medicine sent to them from Canada so dogs can be cured of diseases and live to hopefully see better days.

Bob tells Fay he is constantly debating with the other screenplay writers and producers at Disney wanting “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” to be sweet and childlike but my story is not so sweet. At best it is bittersweet. Bob has had to compromise so as not to frighten the audience many who will be children but he swears this will not be a “Lady and the Tramp” syrupy feature but one with a cutting edge that will educate its viewers of the rough life street dogs endure in Egypt. After 8 weeks of being in Los Angeles and two weeks in Cairo Bob has taken his production role as far as it can go and agrees to have his story finally transformed into a Disney animated film. What a paradise it is he is at home with us although he is back two days a week to supervise the animation and voice overs and ensure the script is as agreed upon by the producers and writers. And he is also involved with the musical score to sure it sets the right tone.

In 16 weeks, the final version of “Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog” is ready for distribution meaning me Bob, Fay and Dillie the Westie are going on a promotional tours along with our security team. Bob is exhausted but wants to ensure the success of the film not for pecuniary reasons but to accurately portray my life in Cairo and the life of street dogs there and to show the dedication of some kind souls in Egypt and Canada that work to rescue me and my bothers and sisters. All of us in this household are going to Los Angeles for the film premiere!

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog”: The Final Cut: Reggie’s Security Detail: Penny The Silver Spooned Addition: Already on Probation! Chapter Thirty (30)

My security detail has unsavory elements to it. The Mookster could be referred to The Mobster with a former nefarious North Korean cuddle up with a tyrant background. Ollie handling explosives. Kit Kat with an alleged extremist and drug running past. As well Dillie the Westie has a bit of a silver spooned streak to him having “the good suburban life” with frequent trips to Niagara wine country, dog walkers, wonderful cheeses and the best Montreal bagels but even he has bitten a few,,,sorry nipped may be a better word.

My security team are rough and tumble guys hating baths and being groomed and happy to wander around with burrs on their legs and not minding it. They have street savvy.

Penny is a very high priced oodle of some sort. She hangs with the helicopter set buzzing around flashing a fancy headset with her master. Hanging out at “flying clubs” drinking fancy spring water from a silver-plated water bowl and regularly chowing down on Kobe beef slices and Lobster Thermidor and loving baths and grooming most likely dreaming of being best in the show at the Royal Hamilton Dog Breeders Championship. We do need Penny for two reasons.

Princess Penny being wheeled around on her safari vacation at Lion Park in Magog Quebec

Her soft temperament and high breeding. Bob was once a dabbler in criminal law with high profile cases including a client who dropped his bus pass at the scene of the crime stealing 25 pens at Bargain Harolds. Bob said whenever he was in court you could “smell a cop” miles away and identify them with their ruddy complexion and cheap suits. Penny looks like a princess and can blend in with any crowd. No cheap suits instead proudly sporting a Dolce & Cubana collar. My guys have a cute look but they smell like security and look a bit conspicuous. Surveillance can be assisted by the special skills that The Mookster, Ollie and Kit Kat possess but Penny has a “blend in” ability making her an effective part of our team. Her sophisticated breeding imparts different analytical skills to round out our security team’s intellectual capabilities.

Penny flies an Oodlecopter designed by the folks at Ferrari. Built by hand with controls custom designed for Penny. It is light and fast and ideal for aerial surveillance and we need that for tip top security.

Why would a princess like Penny want to join our crew? Penny’s view is that learning how to fly a Oodlecopter she wants more and more living on the edge experiences and offering her “security expertise” gives her a thrill.

Dillie the Westie has met Penny in the tony and exclusive Beamsville on one of his never-ending holidays to Niagara-on-the-Lake and they got along like peaches and cream so he vouches for her. It takes one silver spooned to know another.

But our initial surveillance training with Penny has had a glitch. The Mookster was training her with a practice “adultery surveillance” outside The Maple Motel in Vaughn, Ontario a notorious hang out for extra-marital frolickers. Penny fell asleep on the job. So I had no choice to put her on probation but let’s attribute that to her having no time in the morning to gobble (or savour as Penny calls it) her beloved jasmine tea with her enoki mushroom omelet made with organic eggs from St. Davids. Penny is not a “No Frills” girl!

Penny hard at work on her first surveillance training

WELCOME PENNY (when and if you pass your probation)

: Travels of My Mother: 23July1971: St. Nicholas, Crete, Greece: Surly and Grasping Cretans

Dear Mother:

I am sitting in an open-air café trying goat’s milk for the first and last time. It must be 90 degrees but there is a lovely breeze blowing. We arrived on the island of Crete at 3:30 p.m. yesterday after 7 hours on deck on a very rough ocean. Both Robert and I are excellent sailors as we have many hours left on the water before we return to Athens.

Iraklion, Crete

This is the largest city in Crete. We have a pension in town and it is too far from the beach. We will probably leave Crete on Saturday to go to another island. This island is far too touristy. We are seeing the ancient ruins of Knossos today then to the museum and finally to the beach. I don’t ever intend to return to Crete. I don’t like it here. Nor does Rob so we are going to push off. It is not only very hot but humid. I find the people here very grasping not at all like the other Greek islands.

Next day

We are headed to beach just having had breakfast. The sandy beach near us stretches for miles. We spent yesterday going through the Royal palace at Knossos. It is unbelievable they have uncovered an entire city. The archaeologists were busy digging in 3 or 4 sites. They number every stone and sift all the earth.

Last night Rob and I wandered around, had a late dinner and did not return until,11 p.m. I like eating outside as it is too hot to do anything else. We will leave here at 6 p.m. tomorrow sleeping on the boat for the island of Skiros. Then after a week to Skopelos and soon we must make our way back to Athens to prepare for our trip back home. If there are no planes flying out of Athens we will have to fly from Frankfurt and leave from there.

Love Marnee

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog”: The Final Cut: Reggie’s Security Detail: Kit Kat: Cary Grant Personality: Keen Film Set Awareness; Chapter Twenty Nine (29)

Kit Kat originally hails from Mozambique a key exporter of heroin and amphetamines into Portugal. Kit Kat was a messenger dog for the ISIS linked Al Shabab but what did Kit Kat know about politics and drug running? Was he facilitating narcotic distribution or extremism or both? Al Shabab ran drugs a key funding source for ISIS and their ilk. Al Shabab operatives fed and sheltered Kit Kat and he became somewhat of a mascot at their Cap Delgado headquarters. But one evening Kit Kat witnessed the torture and beheading of an Italian nun by Al Shabab and that was it. He ran away from the horror stumbling upon a Rwandan security battalion battling Al Shabab. Using all his Cary Grant charm he befriended a South African anti terrorist unit and through grit and charm ended up in Cape Town exuding yet more charm being adopted by a first mate on a ship bound for Lisbon. That first mate left the ship in Lisbon for a walk in the port with man’s best friend. Kit Kat bolted leaving his ‘best friend” bewildered was hit by an automobile. Fortunately Kit Kat was only stunned by the impact. The driver Nilton was the head of security for the Port Protection Service (PPS) an organization funded by the Portuguese Minister of Agriculture and “The Douro Cabal of Ten” a syndicate of the 10 top producers of Port in the Douro region of Portugal. The Cabal was being financially challenged by counterfeit Port running rings in China and Albania. The PPS detected and “terminated” these rings. Kit Kat was, and let’s not mince words, a PPS spy and informant hounding counterfeiters at least until he took a bullet in the flank as the PPS was closing in on “The Big Sardine” a major ringleader of counterfeit Port operating out of Victorian style Port warehouses in Vila Nova de Gaia directly across from Porto. Portuguese government “informational units” captured footage of Kit Kat lunging for The Big Sardine and being felled by a bullet fired by The Big Sardine’s bodyguard. Kit Kat became a short-lived Portuguese hero landing a role in a limited run television show “Mighty Douro Dog”. The show was a flop and Kit Kat was transferred to film set security for three years at Obrigado Film Studios before being taken in as a mascot at The Home For Senior and Infirm Port Quinta Workers in Porto.

It so happened that I was a big fan of this obscure television flop and knew about Kit Kat’s exploits. Bob made a generous donation to the home and the financially enriched management of The Home For Senior and Infirm Port Quinta Workers shipped Kit Kat to Toronto where he will serve on my security detail. Kit Kat has an uncanny ability to treat all his surroundings as a film set and if things are out of sync he will know. Assassinations and murders almost always occur when there is something strange in “the set”. Kit Kat is cognizant of security requirements for media events and the way my life is heading it just might be a media event for awhile at ease and Kit Kat on my team puts me at ease. As a canine star perhaps Kit Kat can help me with my acting?

WELCOME KIT KAT!

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” : The Final Cut: Reggie’s Security Detail: Ollie the Pup Known as “The One with the Enlightened Nose”: Chapter Twenty Eight (28)

I warn you. Ollie is not a puffball like The Mookster but more of a cuddlekins. But get on his wrong side count your fingers before you meet his ire as when Ollie is pissed man that pup is on fire!

Ollie is in my hood like The Mookster and I love both those dogs almost as much as Dillie the Westie.

Ollie was born in Salmon Arm, British Columbia. Like The Mookster his past is a bit spotty and I am not referring to the spots on his coat. Ollie was a guide dog possessing a supreme hunting instinct. He was part of an illegal hunting guide operation for Chinese tourists looking for big game bears in Northern British Columbia. He could sniff out a bear two kms away and all those rich capitalist industrialists from the PRC always returned home with a haul of bear gall bladders and testicles which you can bet were never shared with the proletarians working in their factories. Ollie had such a reputation in Peking he was referred to as “The One with The Enlightened Nose” and the talk of the old boys’ clubs in Peking as the stories flowed about him in copious quantities as did the counterfeit Port. Exaggerated stories proliferated about his bravery like attacking a group of Grizzly Bears and biting off their heads and saving the Chinese hunters from a horrible death.

The Royal Canadian Mounted Police busted the hunting ring and since he was a dog how could you sentence him to 12 years in the Big House? Ollie became a quasi mascot to Unit #65 of the RCMP in Salmon Arm. The squad realized, when they were not defending themselves from harassment charges on fellow female officers, that Ollie had a terrific sense of smell. That dog could smell Mooseburgers heading into the detachment twenty minutes before they arrived. And when the television crew from Peking arrived to report on the “detention” of “The One With The Enlightened Nose” the RCMP realized they had a valuable asset….a potential bomb sniffer. Ollie was “transferred” to RCMP headquarters nestled in Ottawa’s Red-Light District for bomb squad training. It was discovered Ollie had what corporate types referred to as “transferable skills” enabling him to sniff out not only Colombian blow but explosives and the rest is history.

On a protective security detail for the Grand Vizier of Albania he sniffed out the bomb but it exploded prematurely as those Albanians could never tell time properly and the explosive device was detonated 3 minutes earlier than planned. Ollie was felled with shrapnel to the eye.

Ollie was pensioned off and adopted in a furever home by Dunny Funkheiser and his wife Peggy-Sue (not the one that got married).

Given my Muslim “background” hence the potential for aggravating many extremist camps and their love of IED’s Ollie is my man….ooops…my pup.

WELCOME OLLIE!