“The Madness Inside of Me”: Subdued, Sophisticated and With Some Rough Cutting Edges

Thank goodness for indie cinema. It can be rough, jarring and unsettling and far from the smooth and predictable big budget perfection that is boring and uninspiring,

“The Madness Inside Me” could stink with Hollywood predictability but it veers from that oft beaten path.

Imagine you are in your home and some psycho killer bursts in and kills your husband and bashes your head in.

So what is your reaction? Let the law take over and prosecute? Or do you somehow move to a vigilante status and try and deal with the murder the way YOU WANT TO.

Dr. Madison Taylor (Merrin Dungey) was the victim of a home invasion which she survived but her husband was murdered.

Madison is a prison psychiatrist somewhat used to psychotic killers and she develops an unhealthy bond with Francis Tate (Devon Graye) the killer of her husband.

Madison bonds in a very unhealthy way with Tate and descends into his break and enter thrill seeking mentality.

Is Madison bent on revenge or has she crossed into the evil side? To the evil side she has moved but revenge is hers as you can witness with the bullet hole in Tate’s head.

Has Madison descended into a psychotic psychiatrist?

Interesting that a psychotic psychiatrist continues to treat psychotic criminals. It takes one to know one?

The film could have been turned into some mundane and predictable piece of Hollywood slop but it rises above that temptation into a more complex and nuanced film. You might dare to try and compare it to a mundane Die-Hard Bruce Willis film but it is too nuanced and sophisticated to fall into that trap.

Gray and Dungey do very well but the supporting cast is a bit rough and unpolished but how could they be anything more considering the plot they are acting in? Their less than polished performance only adds credibility to the film.

The film was written and directed by Matthew Berkowitz. This 89-minute film opens in select theatres and digital platforms on September 3rd 2021.

You can see the trailer here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kdw4vu0ELP0

RKS Wine: The Penniless Pensioner Is Such A Prig Sometimes: Puglian Primitivo

At one point PP tells me he is excited about us trying the cheapest wines for what gems he might discover. Yet when I tell him I am trying a Primitivo from Puglia he says he is not interested in junk from Southern Italy. I tell him to ease up with his snobbery and he keeps reverting to clay soils and Merlot from the Right Bank in France. He really can be annoying sometimes. I get the impression he is bullshitting me about his excitement about his “new bottom of the barrel” wine adventure. I tell him Primitivo was originally from Croatia and it was brought to California and became known as Zinfandel to which he replies he has no great affinity for “cheap barbeque wines”.

So let’s try a Primitivo from Puglia from Rivera. On the nose sweet red cherry, raspberry and milk chocolate. On the palate a low tannic load. A nice cut of cherry pie, watermelon and peppery spice. Well PP has a point that Primitivo makes a good (not a cheap) barbeque wine. Like PP get real do you want to drop over a $100 for a wine with your burger! Don’t be a prig. Loosen up and recognize finally you are a penniless pensioner with a few Panamanian bank accounts you seem to deny.

I’d say this is a cheerful wine fit for a traditional meal in Argentina of flank steak with chimichurri sauce and red onion and tomato salad on the side. It will do instead of a trophy high altitude Malbec from the Uco Valley! The slight ream of low-level acidity will suit the red onion and tomato salad. Drink now.

Drink now and yes it will suit a lowly burger made from ground sirloin and juzed up with hot pepper, Worchester Sauce, egg, breadcrumbs and sesame seed oil and whatever else you want to add to make a creative burger. The possibilities for a creative burger are endless.

(Rivera 2018 Primitivo Salento, IGT, Azienda Vinicola Rivera, Andria, Italy, $15.95, Liquor Control Board of Ontario # 19590, 14%, 750 mL, Robert K. Stephen A Little Birdie Told Me So Rating 91/100).

Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog: Some Fine Tuning for a Street Dog

Although when with Anwar I was fully trained at least by Egyptian standards.

What do Fay and Bob expect of me knowing I may be a bit rough around the edges because of the tough time I spent on the streets of Cairo? Can I deliver and be the perfect Canadian dog that I really want to be? Canadians have been so good to me it is my duty to show them Egyptian dogs can be as good as Canadian dogs. While it is my duty to be a good dog it is also a matter of pride for me. These Canadians have done many favours for me so I must not let them down. Dillie has been so nice to me too and as he is my elder I respect him and I also feel I owe a duty to him.

So what does Reggie have to do to be a good Canadian dog?

  • Going to the bathroom

While with Anwar in Cairo he taught me that I must poo and pee outside. Yes I had a few accidents as a puppy but I learnt to go to the bathroom outside according to a regular schedule. But when you live on the street as I did in Cairo the rules change as you can pee and poo when you like and where you like. Coming to Canada meant I had to be the dog I was with Anwar. Bob and Fay take me for regular walks and sometimes very long ones which I love. Dillie and I like to sniff and pee to tell other dogs we have been there! But I have had a few accidents at Bob and Fay’s home. You see sometimes I forget where I am and just pee like I am on the streets. Then I realize what I have just done and don’t know why I have been so bad. I am ashamed and hide. Bob and Fay call me gently and tell me softy that I am not a good dog for peeing in their house. They say to each other that my time on the street has caused me to forget my manners but they do not hit or curse me. Their kindness makes me try hard to please them and show them I am smart and well mannered and after a few weeks I am perfect with no accidents.

  • Being crated

Sometimes Bob and Fay go out shopping or to see friends and they leave me and Dillie behind. When they leave they put me in a cage they call a crate. They tell me they are so sorry they have to do it. I feel a bit better knowing Dillie was caged when he was young.

The first time they did it I went frantic yelping and crying. I have always been free and I am so frightened being caged. But strangely after a few times of being crated I begin to feel safe in my home. In a way it is like living in the cardboard boxes I lived in on the streets of Cairo. I stop panicking after being crated a dozen times because I know Fay and Bob always return and let me out and give me hugs and pats on the head telling me how good I am. I think I was so frightened when Bob and Fay left I thought they would never return and I was being crated for being a bad dog. But when they left after being crated I wasn’t frightened as I was in my own home, Reggie’s home!

  • Being nice to other dogs

I knew that being nice to Dillie was my most important job for Bob and Fay. Being my elder and being a friendly and loving dog, we get along like best friends. We are best friends. He has never lived on the streets like me but he has lived with Bob and Fay and their son Drew and daughter Lexis for all of his 13 years. He knows humans much better than I, well at least kind and good humans, and I have much to learn from him.

I do have problem with bigger dogs like the Rottenwhiler that bit me in Cairo when I tried to steal his food from his bowl. I lunge out and growl like a crazy rabid dog. Something makes me do it. I get dreams in my head that the big dog is the Rottenwhiler that attacked me. Dillie also lunges but not at all big dogs, just dogs that threaten him by moving quickly towards him and barking at him. Bob and Fay have a trainer that is working with me to stop this lunging. I get liver treats for not lunging so I associate treats for not lunging and it works. I am beginning to like the bigger dogs that Dillie likes usually oodles of some sort!

The trainer tells Bob and Fay that I am “making progress” but that the dog attack I suffered in Cairo left “deep scars” in my mind that may never heal or take much time to heal. I am getting better. Really I am. The more time that passes and the safer and more loved I feel the more I trust Bob and Fay will never let a big and bad dog bite me.

  • Being nice to people

The trainer told Bob and Fay that while living in the streets of Cairo people were mean to me which is true but there were some humans that fed me and gave me water. The people in Canada are all nice although watching the news I heard that there are over 100,000 homeless cats and dogs in Canada every year so Canadians can’t be perfect. The news report also mentioned “puppy mills” where puppies live in horrible and cruel conditions.

Dillie has a good soul and when you know him not a mean bone in his body but when the door knocks he goes a bit nuts. He doesn’t much like Bob and Fay’s cleaning lady. So he is crated when she is in the house. She is a nice lady but I sense she does not like dogs so I stay away and keep Dillie company outside his cage. We both bark at the postman but Dillie says this is a tradition for dogs so I bark too. The postman smiles and says hello to us.

Both of us love chasing and barking at squirrels which Dillie tells me is a dog tradition! There were no squirrels in Egypt only rats.

Bob and Fay’s daughter Lexis had a new baby Peggy. Everyone keeps a close eye on us when Peggy is over for a visit or we go visit her. Babies are strange but I like them but no one seems to trust us. These humans can be strange.

  • Being obedient

This means doing what humans tell you to do. This is not a problem for me as isn’t there an expression don’t bite the hand that feeds you.

  • Going to school

Going to puppy school is a bit strange for me as I am not a puppy. But for eight weeks I go to puppy school with Bob and Dillie. Dillie has been through it and admits he wasn’t the best student! It really is about doing what you are told and that comes easy to me because of all the BBC television I watched I understand English so very well. What is new to me is the hand signals we should know like “down”, “up” and “stay”. No problem for me but these puppies are so silly I feel embarrassed to be with them!

RKS Wine: The Penniless Pensioner’s Blowout Christmas Parties of Yesteryear

PP told me recently his small 25 lawyer Toronto Bay Street law firm used to hold a blowout Christmas Party primarily designed for support staff and articling students who were given the 24th off to put them in a celebratory mood for the party that night. PP says we held it over the years at swank hotels. Cocktails, dinner, dancing and prizes with an open bar and taxi chits mandatory for all. The support staff were excited for weeks about the party. They could bring a spouse or best friend. Perhaps it was luxury they could never afford. PP fondly recalled a variety of wines from Australia’s d’Arenberg Winery that were served at this party. He remembers one red was called The High Trellis and the Stump Jump which suited the ox filets flown in from Portugal.

The High Trellis was a Cabernet Sauvignon from the famous McLaren Vale region in South Australia. PP said with the Portuguese ox it was divine..a mind blowing food and wine connection. Not a trophy wine as of course only the senior partners of the firm would appreciate such fine wines. PP was a bit of a snob when it came to food and wine. But the food prepared was fit for a royal dinner. The wine was pretty good…”good enough for the staff “ PP said.

So reliving PP’s fond memories I try The High Trellis.

It seems upon opening the bottle we are facing an Aussie big blaster. A huge nose of blackberry, cassis, red plum, prunes and milk chocolate. On the palate moderate and broad-based tannins with a slight burn not surprising considering the alcohol is at 14.5%. The palate was definitely full of robust and almost overly ripe black cherry, subdued blackberry and cassis. This is a full throttle Cabernet Sauvignon that takes no hostages and is the type of wine that launched many Australian Cabernet Sauvignons and Chardonnays. Really a must with food but if you are not willing to fly in Portuguese ox a huge slab of Prime Rib or Filet Mignon in black peppercorn sauce will do nicely. PP did mention there were some “good looking hippy vegetarian law clerk chicks” (not my words) who selected the vegetarian option of Portobello and Truffle Burgers and he did try the burger with the wine and gave it a thumbs up. “Man can those hippie chicks dance!” Such a phrase in today’s politically correct world would not be uttered yet with the new ethos of diversity and global inclusion peddled in the corporate world perhaps such a phrase is now politically correct! Don’t we have to include everyone so we can exclude everyone?

Getting back on topic of wine rather than the musings of a possibly lecherous old corporate lawyer the wine is brash and bold and is still the type of Cabernet Sauvignon adored by many.

By the way PP did marry one of these hippie chick vegetarians and that marriage lasted less than a year. Mental cruelty was the basis for the divorce. The PP’s meat consumption was unreasonable cruelty. Although the divorce was granted the judge was PP’s friend and as the skills of the petitioner would readily afford excellent employment prospects PP walked away without any support obligations.

He denied the child was his.

(The High Trellis McLaren Vale 2017 Cabernet Sauvignon, d’Arenberg, McLaren Vale South Australia, $19.95, Liquor Control Board of Ontario # 943456, 750 mL, 14.5%, Robert K. Stephen A Little Birdie Told Me So Rating 89/100).

The Stump Jump is a GSM (Grenache, Shiraz and Mourvèdre) which the Australians do quite well. A nose of strawberry jam, Christmas cake, blackberry and raspberries. On the palate spicy and feisty. Cherry pie, black pepper and blueberry. Well made indeed like the High Trellis. Give it some air and it smooths out with a slight bit of sweetness. Good to quaff and I’d pair it with slow cooked leg of lamb on the barbeque. Might as well drink by the end of 2022 although I do not think it will improve with ageing.

(The Stump Jump 2017 GSM, McLaren Vale, South Australia, d’Arenberg, McLaren Vale, Australia, $15.95, 14.5%, Liquor Control Board of Ontario # 173294, 750 mL, Robert K. Stephen A Little Birdie Told Me So Rating 91/100).

RKS Wine: The Lure That Attracts the Fish? Rousanne and Viognier?

As a wine writer swimming in a school of wine reviewers the reality is that every wine bottled can’t be reviewed. But this fish likes the Viognier grape on its lonesome and in a blend. It tends to give white wine a noticeable presence with apricots, tangerines and honey. Of course, if you do not like a wine with a strong presence perhaps Viognier is not for you. But at $16.95 this organic Jonty’s Ducks Pekin White from South Africa may be the lure that hauls you in.

It has a light gold colour. BINGO! The Viognier is certainly noticeable in the blend despite the fact there is also some Chenin Blanc, Roussanne and Sémillon in the blend.

Could it be this duck has had too much Jonty’s? Photo Lutz Fullgraf

On the nose pineapple, tangerine, peach, pear and honey all in a robust package not for those who prefer more demure and light wines. On the palate its robustness is not lost so you end up with a full-bodied white wine. It is a bit drier than I thought but perhaps because of the Sémillon that takes a few years to really develop a distinctive taste. So in addition to the pineapple, peach, tangerine, pear and honey you get a twist of guava and white grapefruit. A wine where nothing is out of whack. I wonder what seafood dishes South Africa is known for as this wine seems meant for seafood. Lobster, crab, shrimp or prawns in a white wine, cream and garlic type sauce. The wine is named for the ducks that waddle in the vineyard feasting on insects removing the need for insecticides.

Perhaps these ducks have not been laying into the grape juice? Photo Robert K. Stephen

(Avondale Jonty’s Ducks Pekin White 2018, WO Paarl, Avondale, Paarl, South Africa, $16.95, Liquor Control Board of Ontario # 439554, 750 mL, 13%, Robert K. Stephen A Little Birdie Told me So Rating 91/100).

Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog: “Reggie on Probation!”

Here I was after two glorious weeks with Bob, Fay and their West Highland Terrier Dillie. I wake up every morning and say my prayers to Allah and I thank him for taking care of me and I express my gratitude for being alive. Dillie is puzzled by this as Fay and Bob raised and trained him since he was a pup. I think he has an attitude of taking his life and all its comforts for granted. He still is my best dog friend and it is not his fault he has lived with what humans call a “silver spoon in his mouth”. But my life was like his until my master Anwar was arrested and executed for writing articles critical of the Egyptian government and the “silver spoon” was yanked out my mouth as I was tossed into the mean streets of Cairo. But through this adversity and tough time I learnt just how lucky I am to be alive every day.

Little did I know while I was staying with Bob and Fay I was on probation. From the BBC documentaries I have seen probation is where a criminal is released from jail and stays out of jail if the criminal remains on good behaviour. I heard Fay say to Bob after my first week with them that I was on probation. But I am Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog and not a criminal! How can I be on probation? Is there some mistake?

Once I regained control of my racing mind I heard more.

Firstly I had to have a good temperament agreeable to Fay, Bob and Dillie. Despite my stupid mistake of nipping Bob on my first day all three of us are getting along wonderfully.

Secondly I had to get along with other humans and dogs. Although most humans mistreated me in Cairo and made me suspicious of them the staff at the animal hospital, the policeman that picked me after that big dog bit me and took me to the animal hospital and people that fed me scraps and gave me water showed me that some Egyptians cared about dogs. In Canada I quickly realized that most humans were kind-hearted and loved dogs so I began to trust them. As for other dogs I like smaller dogs like me and they like me. But as for big dogs like the Rottenwhiler that bit me in Cairo when I tried to take food from his bowl when I see a big dog I get frightened and angry at the same time and growl and lunge out but Bob or Fay hold me back and reassure me I am safe. Bob and Fay look at me and say that they will not let a big bad dog bite me. This makes me feel safe but the same things happen each time I see a big dog that looks like a Rottenwhiler. Does this mean I have broken my probation?

Bob says to me shortly after my two weeks with them that he must take me to an animal hospital to get a wellness check from a person called a vet. I think vets took care of me at the animal hospital in Cairo. Fay and Bob want to make sure they have a healthy dog and not a sick one with health problems. I don’t think this will be hard for me as the Canadian adoption agency made sure I had all sorts of sharp needles full of medicine before I came to Canada. Yes I was covered in fleas and had a few sores on me and an infected eye which were taken care of in Cairo. They also made me give blood for seeing if I had any “tropical diseases”.  So the fact I made it to Canada proves I am well doesn’t it?

Bob gives me a bath which I love and he brushes me quickly looking for fleas of which he cannot find. Then off we all go to the animal hospital. I am very nervous as if my health is bad will I be thrown off the period called probation.

Dillie the West Highland Terrier tells me they are very nice at the animal hospital and Bob gives him liver treats even if he farts after eating them. So we park the car and enter the animal hospital where a Dr. Furby gives me a through examination after scanning my medical records the adoption agency gave Fay and Bob. He says I am “fit as a fiddle”. I have no idea what that means but as Fay and Bob are smiling I think it is good news. Fay and Bob cook Dillie and I the most delicious meal I have eaten with rice and ground beef and cooked sweet potato.  Bob says this is a party for a dog who has found his forever home. I am not a howler but I give a big howl of happiness and thank Allah for his goodness. I never ever thought in my heart I would find a forever home.

Reggie The Egyptian Street Dog is the luckiest dog in the world!

Canada Announces Sanctions Against Belarus

Regulations Amending the Special Economic Measures (Belarus) Regulations

Whereas the Governor in Council is of the opinion that gross and systematic human rights violations have been committed in Belarus;

Therefore, Her Excellency the Governor General in Council, on the recommendation of the Minister of Foreign Affairs, pursuant to subsections 4(1)Footnotea, (1.1)Footnoteb, (2) and (3) of the Special Economic Measures ActFootnotec, makes the annexed Regulations Amending the Special Economic Measures (Belarus) Regulations.

Regulations Amending the Special Economic Measures (Belarus) Regulations

Amendments

1 The portion of section 2 of the Special Economic Measures (Belarus) RegulationsFootnote1 before paragraph (a) is amended by replacing “the schedule” with “Schedule 1”.

2 The Regulations are amended by adding the following after section 3:

Transferable securities and money market instruments

3.1 It is prohibited for any person in Canada or any Canadian outside Canada to, directly or indirectly, deal in transferable securities and money market instruments, including treasury bills, certificates of deposit and commercial papers but not including instruments of payment, issued by

(a) Belarus;

(b) Belarusbank, Belinvestbank, Belagroprombank or any other organization controlled by Belarus; or

(c) a person acting on behalf of or at the direction of an entity referred to in paragraph (a) or (b).

Debt financing — 90 days

3.2 It is prohibited for any person in Canada or any Canadian outside Canada to, directly or indirectly, transact in, provide financing for or otherwise deal in debt of longer than 90 days’ maturity, including bonds, loans, debentures, extensions of credit, loan guarantees, letters of credit, bank drafts, bankers’ acceptances, discount notes, treasury bills, commercial paper and other similar instruments in relation to

(a) Belarus;

(b) Belarusbank, Belinvestbank, Belagroprombank or any other organization controlled by Belarus; or

(c) a person acting on behalf of or at the direction of an entity referred to in paragraph (a) or (b).

Insurance and reinsurance

3.3 It is prohibited for any person in Canada or any Canadian outside Canada to, directly or indirectly, provide insurance or reinsurance to

(a) Belarus or an organization controlled by Belarus; or

(b) a person acting on behalf of or at the direction of an entity referred to in paragraph (a).

Petroleum products

3.4 It is prohibited for any person in Canada or any Canadian outside Canada

(a) to import, purchase, acquire, ship or otherwise deal in any good referred to in Part 1 of Schedule 2, wherever situated, that is exported from Belarus;

(b) to provide to Belarus or to any person in Belarus any financial, technical or other services related to any good referred to in paragraph (a); or

(c) to provide to Belarus or to any person in Belarus any insurance or reinsurance related to any good referred to in paragraph (a).

Potassium chloride

3.5 It is prohibited for any person in Canada or any Canadian outside Canada to import, purchase, acquire, ship or otherwise deal in any good referred to in Part 2 of Schedule 2, wherever situated, that is exported from Belarus.

3 The portion of section 4 of the Regulations before paragraph (a) is replaced by the following:

(1) Sections 3 to 3.5 do not apply in respect of

4 Section 8 of the English version of the Regulations is amended by replacing “the schedule” with “Schedule 1”.

5 The schedule to the Regulations is numbered as Schedule 1.

6 The Regulations are amended by adding, after Schedule 1, the Schedule 2 set out in the schedule to these Regulations.

Transitional Provisions

7 Sections 3.1 to 3.3 of the Special Economic Measures (Belarus) Regulations, enacted by section 2, do not apply in respect of activities that were undertaken before the day on which this section comes into force.

8 Sections 3.4 and 3.5 of the Special Economic Measures (Belarus) Regulations, enacted by section 2, do not apply to goods or services if a contract for the import, purchase, acquisition or shipment of or other dealing with the goods or for the provision of the services is entered into before the day on which this section comes into force.

Application Before Publication

9 For the purpose of paragraph 11(2)(a) of the Statutory Instruments Act, these Regulations apply according to their terms before they are published in the Canada Gazette.

Coming into Force

10 These Regulations come into force on the day on which they are registered.

SCHEDULE

(Section 4)

SCHEDULE 2

(Paragraph 3.4(a) and section 3.5)

PART 1

Petroleum Products

1 Petroleum oils and oils obtained from bituminous minerals (excluding crude oil); preparations containing at least 70% by weight of petroleum oils or of oils obtained from bituminous minerals, these oils being the basic constituents of the preparations, not elsewhere included or specified; waste oils containing mainly petroleum or bituminous minerals

2 Petroleum gas and other gaseous hydrocarbons

3 Petroleum jelly, paraffin wax, micro-crystalline petroleum wax, slack wax, ozokerite, lignite wax, peat wax, other mineral waxes, and similar products obtained by synthesis or by other processes, whether or not coloured

4 Petroleum coke, petroleum bitumen and other residues of petroleum oil or of oil obtained from bituminous minerals, not elsewhere included or specified.

5 Bituminous mastics, cutback bitumen and other bituminous mixtures based on natural asphalt, on natural bitumen, on petroleum bitumen, on mineral tar or on mineral tar pitch

PART 2

Potassium Chloride

1 Potassium chloride with a potassium content evaluated as K2O, by weight not exceeding 40% on the dry anhydrous product

2 Potassium chloride with a potassium content evaluated as K2O, by weight exceeding 62% on the dry anhydrous product

3 Mineral or chemical fertilizers containing the three fertilizing elements nitrogen, phosphorus and potassium

4 Mineral or chemical fertilizers containing the two fertilizing elements phosphorus and potassium

5 Other fertilizers containing potassium chloride

Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog: “My New Life Begins with Bob and Fay and of Course Dillie the Westie! Evening Time”

Hello. Let me introduce myself. My name is Reggie and I am the luckiest and happiest dog in the world. Please read my story and find out why I am saying this.

Evening time is the time after our afternoon nap. Dillie stands by his bowl at exactly 4:30 p.m. waiting for his chicken kibble. Oh what a happy time of the day. Food in a shiny bowl I don’t have the beg or fight for like in the streets of Cairo! And that Canadian water is so sweet and clean! I have only been with Bob and Fay for a few days and I am treated like a pharaoh himself! In a way I feel the stress of simply having to survive from day to day is slowly melting away. I feel like a happy dog like I did with my master Anwar who was arrested for writing articles against the government and then executed and I found myself in the street. No easy task as I am only 18 pounds and small. So I had to be very clever to outsmart the big dogs which worked well until I was bitten by that Rottenwhiler dog trying to take dinner from his bowl.

After our dinner it is playtime with Bob and Fay. Dillie the Westie, Bob and Fay’s 13-year-old West Highland Terrier, has taught me how to play tug of war with an old towel. Humans playing with their dogs is new to me but I think Anwar played games with me but often I am so sad he is no longer with me I try and forget those days as it hurts me so badly.

There is also fetch with a tennis ball. Bob takes me and Dillie out to the park where he can throw the ball. Bob tells me that Dillie used to be a rocket and played until he was so tired he could not run anymore but now is a bit creaky and limps and can only take a few runs at the ball. I am just about two and I have so much energy but I told you I was a smart dog on the streets of Cairo and I am smart here too! So I ask Dillie if I can run after the ball while he rests and he says yes and that I should have fun! I really like Dillie so I must show him deference as a matter of the respect he deserves and not make him jealous.

Dillie is a bit creaky and has a slight limp. This happens to older dogs and it will happen to me so I have to show how much I care about my new friend by making sure I do not embarrass him in front of Bob and Fay. I always let him go first and never growl at him but I don’t have to do that as he is so good and accepting of me. In fact in my evening prayers to Allah he leaves the room to give me privacy. Dillie does not know who Allah is but he is wise enough to know I pray to Allah and that he matters to me. The street dogs in Cairo laughed at me for my praying saying if Allah cared about dogs animal control would not try to shoot or poison us. But somehow my prayers brought me to Canada so I know that Allah loves me.

After play time we go back with Bob and I go upstairs with Fay as she always watches the BBC World news every night just like Anwar did. But she watches ABC news after that. So my English is getting very good! After news there is a movie usually and a big treat for me is watching old Lassie movies, watching Lady and the Tramp. I feel like Tramp! There are so many movies with dogs on television as soon as I hear a bark on the television I race to it to see and hear dogs.

Bob spends the evening writing. In fact he has written books before and he told me one evening he is writing a book about me! Who could be interested in a scrappy 18-pound dog from the dirty mean streets of Cairo? Bob must be joking with me. Sometimes I become frightened that the army will take away Bob in the middle of the night like they did to Anwar. But this is not Egypt but Canada so I pray each night to Allah for the safety of Bob and Fay.

Before Dillie and I go to bed we get a walk with Bob in the summer evening. We meet other dogs and Bob often talks to their owners and we dogs, if we like each other, wag our tails and sniff each other. Dillie pees a lot and he tells me he is marking his territory. He can’t explain what that means but says his brain makes him do it. I think he means instinct. I begin to understand it as something wants to make me pee and mark my territory. And if we poop Bob picks it up in a green bag. These Canadians are so clean and polite! We get home and we both head to our beds. Although I think of Anwar each night I feel so safe here I rarely cry and whimper. There is so much love for me here in Canada but in Cairo it was mostly hate except for a few kind souls that gave me food and water and spoke to me softly. I pray to Allah each night thanking those people. My prayers to Allah are of gratitude. I see BBC news clips of angry people in Cairo and those wanting to use the name of Allah in many countries to do bad things. I think they are called terrorists.

“Mutantism on the March” :”Chapter 90 “The New Piracy”

Eno Ergot was a very frustrated individual these days because of his inability to locate his idol Bluebeard. He was beginning to believe the stories everyone was telling him that it was only an actor Richard Burton that played the role of Bluebeard. The real pirate, if there was ever one, had long ago gone to the worms. Ergot had done a marvellous job of establishing a reputation that Bluebeard could identify with, but Bluebeard, if he still lived, refused to be coaxed out of retirement. Eno while discouraged saw his crew was not as focussed  as they smoked weed, drank cases of beer, took saunas and delighted in watching Japanese pornographic films. But they had not lost their sailing skills and few could rival them not bad for aliens!

Ergot was somewhat ashamed of their attempt to rob the luxury liner the King Larry. All went as planned but upon entering the ship and waving their weapons and announcing the stick-up the overweight passengers bloated by too many midnight buffets laughed and cheered these actors thinking this was nothing more than Disney entertainment like an extra added entertainment to titillate passengers. A group of bikers on board invited the crew to the “Pirates Bar” and ordered bottled Tequila service and mescaline was snorted galore. Instead of hitting the safety deposit boxes filled with jewels and cash his crew simply headed off to the Pirates Bar and got hammered drinking and snorting drugs into the early morning hours. They even porked out at the midnight chocolate buffet downing bottles of any liquor available. The crew was so hammered cranes had to be used to load the passed-out crew onto boats. It was a disgrace that no captain should have to bear.

The sad reality that piracy, except off the coast of Borneo, the Philippines and the Azores was nothing but a glorified sea myth. Instead of fleeing pirates people welcomed them in fits of nostalgia. Oh how times had changed. No longer was this mode of crime waged with cloak and dagger. Crime was so civilized and polite it was often difficult to detect who were the real pirates. The lusty pirates had fallen under the charge of the white shirted captains of industry. Why, modern piracy had become so legitimized and respected no one paid much attention to it except for stockholders and financial analysts who called piracy stockholder return. Piracy had become legitimized in the stock exchanges of the world where the clever manipulators were the financial Bluebeard wizards fleecing the deceived and innocent. While the old pirates stole from the rich these new corporate pirates stole from everyone that they could dupe. Ergot thought that this new piracy was called exploitation. Piracy of the old may have been messy at times but it was limited and cleaner. A few heads loped off instead of millions fleeced. 

Eno remembered the promise he had made to Jiber which was a meeting on Earth and co-ordinate their mischief to orchestrate a galactical takeover. Where in the hell was Jiber? The Earth was a large place but eventually they would cross paths. Ergot assembled the grew and informed

Reggie The Egyptian Rescue Dog: “My New Life Begins with Bob and Fay and of Course Dillie the Westie! Mornings and Afternoons”

Hello. Let me introduce myself. My name is Reggie and I am the luckiest and happiest dog in the world. Please read my story and find out why I am saying this.

So you remember how I arrived In Canada from Cairo in Egypt. A big Rottenwhiler attacked me when I tried to steal the food in his bowl. That big guard dog ripped my leg open and I remember losing much blood and I understand a policeman picked me up and carried me an animal hospital where they sewed up my leg and saved my life.

Although I believe I have the ancient blood of the Pharaohs in me I also believe in a God called Allah. Anwar, my late master, prayed to Allah every day and I remember some of the words of his prayers. These words were kind and loving so I think Allah must be a great and loving God. But I will say I am angry this Allah did not protect Anwar from execution by the Egyptian government because he wrote newspaper articles critical of the government and they executed him because of that. I am also angry at Allah for letting that big guard dog attack and hurt me. All this confused me but I think that Allah works in many ways we don’t understand. If all these terrible things never happened I would never have ended up safe in Canada with people who have loved and cared for me. I pray to Allah each night and thank him for his graces. I think he may be so great and loving he has looked out for my well-being.

After biting Bob I felt so very ashamed. Although I may be grateful to Allah I have so much anger and confusion in me for what has happened in my life being thankful and angry at the same time make me confused. I relive Anwar’s arrest, me being thrown into the tough streets of Cairo and that horrible big dog attacking me I wake up in a panic some nights not knowing where I am or what I should do. I whimper and cry and Dillie, Bob and Fay’s West Highland Terrier, comes over and nuzzles me and tells me he will protect me. Bob comes downstairs hearing me cry and picks me up and gives me a gentle rock and a kiss on the head speaking calmly to me saying I will be OK and he and Fay will do everything they can to make me safe. Then suddenly I realize where I am and I stop crying and shaking. Bob then puts Dillie and I out in the dark backyard and we do our business. The sound of the crickets soothes me but Dillie reminds me to beware of the skunks! What are skunks? After coming back in Dillie and I go back to sleep. On the nights I feel scared Dillie lets me crawl into his bed and his snoring makes me feel sleepy and very safe.

Dillie is around 13 so his bladder is not as strong as mine and he barks early in the morning to go pee or as Bob says “widdle”. So we go out together and pee and then my favourite way to start the morning is to get carried up with Dillie to Fay and Bob’s bed where I can sleep beside Bob and Fay and of course with Dillie. Nothing can hurt me not even the bad dreams I have. I feel safe and loved which is important for all dogs!

Bob and Fay are retired lawyers and do not have to get up and leave the house to go to work so we can sleep in. When we all wake up both Dillie and I have a bowl of chicken kibble and a big drink of that cold and clean Canadian water I love so much. A delicious breakfast given to me, one which I do not have to go hunting for! Lucky me!

Bob has tea just like Anwar did! He reads big books. He tells me he is reading “Bleak House”” by Charles Dickens. Anwar used to read Dickens too! He loved Oliver Twist and we saw the film together several times. I always used to shiver when I saw that big bad dog Bill Sykes had. He then does something called yoga and meditates after that. Fay watches some political show called “The View” with women talking politics.

Bob then takes Dillie and I for a walk around the block and we meet dogs and their owners. Everyone asks how Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog is. I get many pats on the head and I sniff the other dogs trying my best not to growl and bark at the big dogs that trigger the bad memories I have of the dog attack I suffered.

Bob and Fay have their lunch and Dillie and I usually get a treat. I love bagels and chunks of feta cheese and so does Dillie. After our lunch we go for a big walk at parks and ravines. At Sherwood Park, where I met Bob and Fay when I was staying with Anthony and Susan, there is an “off leash trail” which Dillie can wander through without his leash but Fay and Bob keep me on my leash. I hear them talking saying they can’t trust me to go off leash yet.

 After our walk we go home and of course Dillie and I have lots of that cold clean water and after we have a long nap we are so tired. I am so tired I have no bad dreams. But we wake up and there is dinner to look forward to!