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“Lost in Puppydom: Rory Dylan Stephen’s Puppydom” (Dylan the Westie Intervenes)

DYLAN THE WESTIE INTERVENES: THINKS RORY HAS A BIT TOO MUCH OF A SWAGGER!

Sorry. I have been in The Land Beyond for over two years now and happily adjusting. I really shouldn’t intervene but Rory has too much of a swagger which can be forgiven (but not left uncommented upon) due to his puppydom.

At a very early age I made the mistake of rushing a cat and received a scratch on my nose with a few drops of blood in return for my “bravery”. To Rory I say keep your distance pup and respect cats and you will be rewarded and suffer less bloodied anatomy by managing your chase instinct. Stick to squirrels. A chance in hell of ever catching one but so much fun in trying. I saw today at 13 weeks you had your first squirrel chase. Well done pup!

As for Mr G’s cats it took me a couple of visits to Boris and Nastasha to warm up to them. Let’s say peaceful co-existence and my goodness I enjoyed sneaking in for a gobble of their cat food.

Let me say it would be highly respectful to mind your manners with Boris and Natasha considering Mr G is your godfather.

Rory, I am keeping an eye out on you and I may have to step in now and then if you need some correction and guidance.

And by the way and take it from me please learn the difference between a skunk and a squirrel.

RKS Literature: Physician Endorsed Cigarettes (Evelyn Waugh)

“The cigarettes Mr Slump smoked were prepared by doctors, so the advertisements declared, with the sole purpose of protecting the respiratory system. Yet Mr Slump suffered and the young secretary suffered with him, hideously. For the first hours of every day he was possessed of a cough which arose from the tartarean depths and was relieved only by whisky. On bad mornings it seemed to the suffering secretary Mr Slump would vomit. This was one of the bad mornings. He retched, shivered, and wiped his face with the handkerchief.”

Evelyn Waugh, “The Loved One”, 1948.

“Lost in Puppydom: Rory Dylan Stephen’s Puppydom” (Mr. G my godfather)

Mr. G My Godfather

Prior to delving a bit further into my arrival at Bob and Fay’s domicile perhaps we should mention my Godfather Mr. G. as I wouldn’t be on my way to Bob and Fay’s if it wasn’t for Mr. G.

Let me make this clear Mr. G is not a criminal godfather in the Toronto Cosa Nostra and the papers he writes are dedicated to the noble profession of law and not the Valachi Papers.

Bob and Mr. G have known each other for thirty years meeting each other when they were wet behind the ears as budding solicitors on Toronto’s power alley, Bay Street.

One evening when Bob and Fay were enjoying a mighty tasty slice of the Dessert Lady’s Strawberry Shortcake at Mr. G’s Bob was expressing his great frustration over not being able to secure a rescue dog despite having had three dogs prior to me. That is 55 years of dog raising experience. Yes there is ageism in the “rescue dog business”. Bob mused you need be no older than 47, have letters of credit ready for dog expenses, 42 references including a reference from the Prime Minister of Canada to “adopt a dog”. Well Mr. G took it upon himself, and it may have been with a wink and a nod to Fay, to “broker” a West Highland Terrier the best breed of dog in the world.

So out of the blue Mr. G phones Bob and advises him he has secured a West Highland Terrier from Ardendale Kennels in Denfield, Ontario for Bob and Fay. Bob had a good chuckle until convinced Mr. G was not jiving. That is where yours truly waltzed onto the stage of Bob and Fay’s life.

Not having met Mr. G I suppose I should either hug or kick him. Sort of depends on what Bob and Fay are like…right? It is hell or heaven for me? But I have, in Beach Boys fashion, a good vibrations for Bob and Fay. West Highland Terriers not only have a keen sense of smell for prey but an ability to ferret out bad egg humans and there is no rotten egg smell emanating from Bob and Fay.

Mr. G has a very big problem though. He has two ragdoll cats Boris and Natasha. He is a ccc…ca..ca CAT PERSON! I have heard a thing or two about cats and dogs and in no time those cats will be dancing to my tune! The way I see things in my early years cats need to be properly managed by dogs. West Highland Terriers back in Scotland were hunters of foxes so pray tell what a cat or two is and come on “rag” and “doll” fail to convey images of mighty felines! Easy work even for a Westie puppy!

RKS Literature: American Girl Preparing to Meet Her Lover (Evelyn Waugh)

“With a steady hand Aimée fulfilled the prescribed rites of an American girl preparing to meet her lover-dabbed herself under the arms with a preparation designed to seal the sweat glands, gargled another to sweeten the breath, and brushed into her hair some odorous drops from a bottle labelled: ‘Jungle Venom’-from the depth of the fever-ridden swamp, the advertisement had stated, where juju drums throb for the human sacrifice, Jeanette’s latest creation Jungle Venom comes to you with the remorseless stealth of the hunting cannibal.”

Evelyn Waugh, “The Loved One”, 1948.

RKS Literature: The Suicidal Hanging of Francis Hinsley (Evelyn Waugh)

“They told me, Francis Hinsley, they told me that you were hung

With red protruding eyeballs and black protruding tongue;

I wept as I remembered how often you and I

Had laughed about Los Angeles and now ‘tis here you’ll lie;

Here pickled in formaldehyde and painted like a whore

Shrimp pink incorruptible, not lost or gone before.”

Evelyn Waugh, “The Loved One”, 1948.

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Wine: Stag’s Hollow 2022 Syrah from Beautiful British Columbia: An Affordable Canadian Côte-Rôtie????

The standard slogan, now gradually disappearing, on British Columbia license plates was “Beautiful British Columbia”. What is not disappearing on the shelves of state monopoly liquor distributor in the province of Ontario (LCBO) are the wines of British Columbia because there were so few of them anyways so not much to disappear. As American wines and spirits are no longer on LCBO shelves British Columbia wines replaced them, right? Right?

Given Trump sabre rattling (and that sword is rapidly rusting) should LCBO shelves be a bit more patriotic and give British Columbia wines some presence? Yes, based on the wines from British Columbia’s Okanagan appellation and that includes Stag’s Hollow wines.

92% Syrah and 8% Viognier. Are we talking about a Canadian version of a Côte-Rôtie from France which I recall to my horror I have a 2005 of such I paid $57 for in 2007 and noted in my cellar I should drink no later than 2012? Côte-Rôtie Syrah’s are enormously expensive and like this Stag’s Hollow Syrah have a tad of the white grape Viognier in the mix!

Why not give a try to Stag’s Hollow 2022 Syrah?

Aroma: Rich and heady blackberry is chairman of the board here. Ultra ripe black raspberry, black cherry, cassis and a delightful waft of roast marshmallows. Could the latter be result of Okanagan wildfires in 2022? Note I did not say “smoky”.

Palate: Smooth. Rich. Full bodied. Slight Kampot pepper influence. Just the right amount of acidity to discipline the rich black fruit. A whisper of coal, graphite and cocoa on the long spicy finish.

Personality: I am assertive, yet moderate tannins remove any label of a big bruiser. Consider me warm and embracing. I am built for food, a main.

Food Match: Absolutely no doubt about a match with Cambodian Beef Lok Lak.

Cellarbility: Consume by 2027-year end.

Price: $39 CDN (winery price). For shipping details contact www.stagshollowwinery.com

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Wine Rating: 94/100. Wine Align 94.

(Stag’s Hollow 2022 Syrah, VQA Okanagan Valley, Stag’s Hollow Winery, Okanagan Falls, British Columbia, 750 mL, 13%).

RKS Literature: These Undertakers Will Fix You Up Real Good (Evelyn Waugh)

“We had a loved one last month who was found drowned. He had been in the ocean a month and they only identified him by his wrist-watch. “they fixed that stiff,” said the hostess disconcertingly lapsing from the high diction she had hitherto employed, ‘so he looked like it was his wedding day. The boys up there surely know their job. Why if he’d sat on an atom bomb, they’d make him presentable.”

Evelyn Waugh, “The Loved One”, 1948.

“Lost in Puppydom: Rory Dylan Stephen’s Puppydom”: (WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE I AM GOING TO?)

WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE I AM GOING TO?

I am not going to say master or mistress as such words suggest a West Highland Terrier is under the control of a human. Quite frankly it just may be the other way around! Just because Westies are featured in many advertisements as cute fluffballs must never diminish our rough and tumble character. Why don’t I say Bob and Fay are my “managers”.

Bob and Fay are retired lawyers and most importantly experienced (pleasantly of course) Westie owners not just of any Westie but the legendary Dylan the Westie not only the cutest Westie ever, except perhaps for me, but a ferocious freedom fighter and successful movie actor starring alongside Nicole Kidman and Russel Crowe and hobnobber with Joe and Jill Biden, the late Gordon Lightfoot and his next door neighbour Drake, the Pope, the Ayatollah and the King of Sweden. I understand he urinated on Vladamir Putin’s leg as a thank you for the Ukrainian “situation”. What flair! What guts!

Bob has written smash screenplays for Walt Disney. You must have heard of “Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” and its two sequels. Bob has won the Nobel Prize in Literature.

Fay manages the huge sums of money earned by Bob from his novels and screenplays and acts as executive director for several philanthropic organizations most of which are for the betterment of canines and ragdoll cats. More about my Godfather Mr. G. and ragdolls to follow.

I am heading back to my “furever home” (God I hate that hackneyed phrase) from the breeder in Denfield, Ontario to Bob and Fay’s 14 room “small cottage” on the Bridlepath area of Toronto. You know that hood where pharma king and his wife were murdered a couple of years ago.

I am overwhelmed by all the bright lights, noises and voices I am hearing up close for the first time and that Glenn Gould pounding his piano on the car radio is giving me a headache.

I should mention I am 9 weeks old. Bob and Fay did pay me a visit when I was a month old. I was told I nearly pooped on Bob’s shoe! I am so embarrassed!