Poetry Corner: “Do you Remember Those Fascist Days?”

 Do You Remember Those Fascist Days?

If you have seen as many World War Two Films
as I have
you may have found the fascination by those nasty Nazis
always asking for identity papers as obsessive and overbearing!
oh by the way do you have your vaccination certificates and photo identification?
and the health workers who refuse vaccination are sent to re-education camps
is this what my Uncle Bill who at 22 died in France shot down by a German pilot died for
as Remembrance Day is coming soon think about it

Robert K. Stephen

“My Life as a Golf Marshall” :What Does a Golf Marshall Do?

A golf Marshall is a golf course ambassador meaning in many cases a job description is impossible as it means handling whatever can come up. Primarily it is moving the game along. It’s called keeping pace. In the ideal world there is an interval between foursomes teeing off every 10 minutes so the space should be always 10 minutes between golfers with no jam ups or bottlenecks throughout the entire 18 holes. But this rarely happens and why? Most golfers should be playing ready golf which means playing individually and not congregating waiting for each golfer to hit and then dispersing for their own shot. It is fine to walk together down the fairway for a bit of time but at some point golfers should head for the ball they strike for their next hit. Not always done particularly by juniors. Then there is the golfer hunting for their lost ball or looking for other’s lost balls. And then there can be the golfer taking five practice swings and duffing the ball. Inconsiderate and rude golfers are the bane of the Marshall who has to be polite and say speed it up or walk to the next hole or leave the course. On the other hand as etiquette courses are not mandatory the laggard golfer may be blissfully ignorant.

So it is a diplomatic game where you feel like saying “You are not a particularly good golfer. You should be playing at a pitch and putt and why the * are you taking more time than a professional golfer to hit your ball. Hit the * ball”. No you are a diplomat saying please, please can you help me and keep pace. If you can’t politely enforce pace you have no career as a Marshall. Sorry “career” is a bad choice of words.

Then you may have to ferry a late golfer to his/her group. You may need to take bandages and ice to a golfer that has scraped a bodily extremity on a rough edge of a golf cart or ferry an elderly golfer up to their car.

Be ready for just about anything. Be patient. Be compassionate. Be even tempered. Do not be overbearing. Be Mother Theresa. Blessed be those who are rude, selfish and ignorant.

Before I go a Marshall loves those who play ready golf in a true Scottish tradition. Walk up to the ball, select a club based on intuition and experience without a viewfinder gauging distance. HIT THE BALL. ONE PRACTICE SWING. PUTT WITHOUT ANY PRACTICE STROKES. MOVE QUICKLY TO THE NEXT HOLE. The Marshall’s dream is seeing golfers are ready golfers.

CREW 2019 Riesling: A Unique Lake Erie North Shore Perspective

I have been to Colchester Ridge Estate Winery (CREW) a few times. It was a rather rustic winery then but things have changed and perhaps it is time to revisit and catch up with progress.

I have had a soft spot for CREW Riesling as I find it more Germanic in style than many of the the Vinho Verde type Niagara Rieslings. You’ve heard my opinion on that before so I best steer clear of a further discussion!

The wine has a light gold colour. Aromas of guava, lime, pineapple and tangerine. On the palate it is just on the edge of off dry. The label says expect racy acidity? That is puzzling as I find it lacking in acidity let alone racy acidity. But I’ll take a softer and slightly sweeter Riesling any day and in my opinion that is what CREW is delivering here. On the palate it is smooth with notes of kiwi, Orri tangerine and honey crisp apples. The finish is short.

The wine is great for sipping but I recall reviewing it a few years ago thinking it would match a grilled cheese sandwich with Gruyere Cheese. I will stick with that but it hit me suddenly this would be a match for Sheppard’s Pie! The back label says pair with brie, sushi, tuna poke and perch tacos. I will not argue with that. But boy would I like to try a perch taco!

Before you act like a deer in the headlights blinded by the praise for Niagara Riesling give this one a try. By the way CREW makes a wickedly delicious Cabernet Franc!

(CREW 2019 Riesling VQA Lake Erie North Shore, Colchester Ridge Estate Winery, Harrow, Ontario, $16.95, Liquor Control Board of Ontario # 483834, $16.95, 750 mL, 11.5%, Robert K. Stephen A Little Birdie Told Me So Rating 90/100).

“Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” :Wrapping Up Public Appearances For Reggie and Bob: Time For a Rest!

Quite literally Bob and I have been ripping up the globe promoting the Disney animated film “Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” and his book of the same name. I am worried a bit about Bob as he looks tired and often speaks in an exhausted monotone. The travel, stress and too many hotel rooms are taking a toll on him. I am only 3 or so and have more energy and I can sleep anywhere. Bob has one last contractual commitment to appear on an American show “Dr. Phil”.

Bob and I fly into Los Angeles the day before the taping of the show. We have an early dinner with some Disney executives and are asleep by 10 p.m. The Disney limo comes at 9 in the morning to take us to Dr. Phil’s set. Dr. Phil greets us and I receive a Dr. Phil bowl full of water while Bob has some jasmine tea. Dr. Phil briefs Bob about the questions he will ask which are rather similar to all the other questions we’ve been asked on “The View”, “The Fifth Estate”, “Oprah” and the many other television shows we have been on. Bob says he has a special announcement to make and asks Dr. Phil to get Christine Gill from Snookie’s Society on the line as well as Mr. Gordon Lightfoot and Drake. They are to speak to a national audience. What has Bob got up his sleeve?

Dr. Phil asks the usual questions and then asks Bob what was in his heart when he wrote “Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog”. Bob comes to life and there is a sparkle in his eye. “My heart was stolen by Reggie that day we ran into him by fate at Sherwood Park in Toronto. My wife Fay and my dog Dylan really warmed up to Reggie and he even shook my hand. There was something special about him. I am not a Buddhist but they believe in auspicious connections meaning what seems random is really destiny. I am not boasting but Reggie has done a great deal to make the world better by being Reggie! A street dog from Cairo has been blessed by the Pope and is a friend of many political leaders. I mean Reggie got the Iranians and Americans talking about nuclear issues because Reggie is seen as a friend to Islam and Christianity. The world was headed to madness and Reggie helped set it on course. This Reggie is my 4th dog but like all the others he has taught me about life and how precious it is.”

The audience goes wild and gives us a standing ovation. Dr. Phil says that he has a big surprise for us which he’d like to launch into before we tell him our surprise. I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! It is President Biden on a video feed. He says hello to the nation and explains what I have done for international relations and announces that Iran and Israel have established diplomatic relations because Americans who release a film about a Muslim dog in such a positive light deserve to be trusted. President Biden says in my honour he will pass an executive order establishing “Rescue Dog Awareness Week”. He then waves at me and says we’ll see you at Camp David next summer.

Dr. Phil looks a bit dazed. Bob then says he will establish “Reggie’s Dogs” dedicated to helping rescue dogs throughout the world. He will fund it initially with twenty million dollars. Then Mr. Gordon Lightfoot (with Bosco) and Drake appear on a video feed saying they are chipping in a million dollars each to Reggie’s Dogs.

Then there is Christine Gill from Snookie’s Society on a video feed. She looks puzzled but breaks into a big grin when Bob announces he is giving a $2 million grant to them. Snookie’s Society is an all-volunteer based non-profit rescue organization based in Toronto and Vancouver specializing in small breed dogs of late from Egypt and China. Snookie’s saved my life paying for my medical care in Cairo and flying me to Toronto. Snookie’s relies on the generosity of donors to realize their mission of safeguarding, rescuing, medically treating, spaying/neutering and finding forever homes for the dogs that enter its rescuing arms. The dogs come from local and international street abandonment, puppy mills, local shelters and facilities including dogs scheduled for euthanasia. Their rescue is 100% foster based, meaning its dogs are placed in the home of a loving volunteer foster family. The dogs are evaluated, medically cared for, loved and receive basic training skills to aid in the transition to their forever home. They have been operating for 19 years and started as a project in a humanities class. You can find more about them at http:/www.snookiessociety.com

Christine is speechless for a minute or so and in a wobbly voice thanks Bob for establishing “Reggie’s Dogs”. She waves to me and in a faltering voice thanks me for being Reggie and doing for rescue dogs what no dog has ever done before. Bob whispers in my ear that when we return to Toronto he will ask Christine to become CEO of Reggie’s Dogs!

The audience goes wild as Dr. Phil signs off. I hear my late master Anwar laughing with joy and Karim my late Snookie’s Society Cairo street dog friend barking from the land beyond. And Dillie the Westie is barking in front of the television set in Toronto for sure!

A voice in my head says, “WELL REGGIE YOU HAVE REALLY DONE IT NOW!” I give a howl of joy and the audience cheers.

RKS Films: “The Witches of the Orient” (Les Sorcières de L’ Orient)

The film “The Witches of the Orient” is not some horror movie but rather a documentary about the Japanese women’s volleyball team that won a gold medal in the 1964 Tokyo Olympics.

The team was the Nichibo Kaizuka volleyball team. Kaizuka is located 30 minutes south of Osaka. The team were all textile factory workers that worked during the day and trained after work. They were the best volleyball team in Japan and lost the final game at the 1960 Rio volleyball championship. But they gathered steam shortly after that defeat with a three-month European tour where the Europeans seemed so gigantic but height bowed to heart and the Japanese team crushed all competitors to the point they were almost magical and hence seen and described as “witches” which can be seen as a insult but as witches have magical powers the team was not offended.

So why such success? Relentless training under a coach named Daimatsu referred to as the “demon” in the Japanese press. He drove these young ladies with a relentless training schedule. Brutal, punishing and painful. Is this because he had some renown in Japan as surviving in the Burmese jungle in World War 2 for months commanding a group of soldiers that all survived their ordeal. Yes I went to a school in Montreal where there were World War 2 vets who must have seen horror like Daimatsu and these guys were relentless when it came to coaching sports teams and gymnastics. In fact our gym teacher was not Mr. Gibb but Major Gibb.

Daimatsu may have been emotionally damaged and he transferred his survival ordeal in molding a team that could not be defeated. Well the demon coach took these ladies to a gold medal in 1964 Tokyo. You can see the emotion gushing out after the gold medal match. Exhaustion and tears flowing like rivers. These ladies were like salmon dying after spawning.

We see some of the surviving team members piecing together their stories with archival footage and animation. A compelling story. Were they nothing more than machines at the textile factory they worked in? Are they symbolic of today’s Olympic athletes more machine than human?

And isn’t it interesting that none of the team members, now in their 70’s, express joy and happiness about their feat. They all seemed to teat it as their duty. So you may see this as an inspiring film but it can also be seen as unspoken criticism of the creation of super beings to compete against other super machines.

I don’t feel like a fish ready to snatch the bait on this film as a positive portrayal of Olympic athletes. It may be a more subtle criticism about the fanaticism of the Olympic games. You may need to read between the lines on this film.

It is a Franco-Japanese production directed by Julien Faraut who also directed “John McEnroe: In the Realm of Perfection”. The next screening will be on September 27th at the Kay Meek Centre in Vancouver which will be Virtual and In-Cinema. Keep your eye peeled for further screenings in Canada and abroad.

Japanese with English subtitles.

RKS Wine: Is There Such Thing as a Golfer’s Wine?

If you are a golfer you’ll recognize the name “Callaway” as a manufacturer of golf equipment and golf balls.

I work at a golf course a couple of days a week as a Marshall and the golf cart lady does good business with beer but there is no wine in her cart.

So with a chuckle I see a bottle of Callaway Cabernet Sauvignon from California! Is it worth a bogey, par, birdie or eagle? The winery was founded by the late Ely Callaway…the real Callaway guy!

The wine’s label says it is California wine meaning all the grapes must come from California so as a vintner you better know your growers!

On the nose blackberry, woodsmoke and black cherry. So as far as aromatics go it gets a par. On the palate it is not particularly infused with tannins. I see little evidence of Cabernet Sauvignon here but this might be cleared up by the LCBO website saying there is also Zinfandel and Petit Sirah so in reality it is a Cabernet Sauvignon blend! There is some spiciness to the wine which is more a characteristic of Zinfandel than Cabernet Sauvignon. It was aged in 90% American oak and 10% in French oak. It must be older American oak as the oak is very quiet in this wine. It is a bit sweet more than the 3 grams per litre as described in the LCBO website. The sweetness robs the wine of its fruit.

A clumsy effort. Is this why I slice Callaway golf balls! And at one point I used Callaway golf clubs until 15 years ago I had custom clubs made for me. I hold the old Callaway’s and they are about as good as this wine. Overall a double bogie.

(Callaway Cellar Selection 2018 California Cabernet Sauvignon, Callaway,  McFarland, California, $17, Liquor Control Board of Ontario # 17804, A Little Birdie Told Me So Rating 84/100).

Photo: Lutz Fullgraf

My Life as a Golf Marshall; The Last of a Dying Breed

Introduction

We can thank artificial intelligence for supposedly making our lives easier. That could be true but at what cost? Will the grocery clerk be completely replaced by self check out? Will hotel check-ins be handled by machines? Will passenger agents at airports be eliminated by machines? I attended a management session years ago and big shot bank executive slammed the brick-and-mortar concept for banks and praised online banking to no end. Bricks and mortar are expensive and paying human beings is expensive. Anyone in a branch was a “service hog”. His view was frankly anti-human and pro-profit for “The Senior Management Team” of the bank!

Well the Golf Marshall is going the way of the dodo bird. Generally speaking if they are paid at all they are either volunteers or poorly paid. Most often they are retirees looking for the advantages of free golf. They love golf and many revel in the opportunity to talk golf with the golfers and teach etiquette to the juniors on the course who have no concept that checking their phones on the green before putting is a flagrant violation of etiquette.

They are there as ambassadors and polite enforcers and they are real live human beings but they are an endangered breed in the mania to reduce costs hence increase profits. In many courses they are already extinct replaced by “pace clocks” on the course and GPS units clipped onto golf bags tracking and spying continually on golfers’ every move. I am sure speakers will soon be installed on golf courses in Big Brother fashion barking orders to speed up.

Who is going to tell the golfer about the nasty geese on the third hole and the terrible slopes on the green begging to suck your golf ball in? Who is going to comfort the frustrated golfer having a bad day? Who is there to give a golf ball to a delighted young golfer?

I applied for the job as a Marshall after 33 years as a corporate lawyer negotiating multi billon dollar deals but now I am lord and master of anyone from stoners to senior executives where my negotiation skills are somewhat neutered and I am resigned to polite begging. The power of gentle persuasion.

RKS Films: “On the Fringe of Wild”: The Viciousness of Homophobia

“On the Fringe of Wild” is nothing but a masterful take on the pain and suffering caused by homophobia. Quite frankly it is a vicious movie and take that as a compliment.

The film was shot in North Bay, Ontario.

Peter (Harrison Brown) is a quiet and sensitive young man finishing off high school. He is struggling to determine if he is gay.

Jack (Cameron Stewart) is probably the same as Peter.

Miles (Michael Melo) is a nasty homophobic gay.

Peter and Jack’s father are homophobic. The kind that think manly activities will transform their children into “real men”. Their crude form of conversion therapy only prolongs their misery and that of Peter and Jack.

I won’t delve into the plot other than saying it should be a wake-up call for those that think their homophobia is harmless. It can strike deep with tragic consequences. The film refrains from being a sermon but instead offers a refreshing look into the agonies of “coming out” for gay men. The main characters do a good job of acting but the parents seem a bit stilted.

This is not a happy story but one that is told with insight and honesty. It illustrates that acceptance by oneself and their community of being gay is a process. Unfortunately in this case it took a tragedy to move the acceptance process. Director Emma Catalfamo sums up the film appropriately. “I was particularly interested in also exploring the societal and generational effect of gender role indoctrination in familial relationships, how this intersects and is often exacerbated by homophobia, as well as the severe mental health implications these destructive forces usually have on people.”

Breaking Glass Pictures will release the film on October 12th and will be available on Tunes/Apple TV, Amazon, Google Play, Vudu, DirecTv and through some satellite and cable providers and on DVD.

You can see the trailer here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzfCuMK4vDs

” Reggie the Egyptian Rescue Dog” : President Biden and His Wife Come to Visit Us

We have all become friends with Joe and Jill. They were to be up in Canada visiting Prime Minister Trudeau on an official basis. Bob called President Biden and asked if he and Jill would like to stay with us for a night and he agreed after his official business was over in Ottawa he and Jill would come for Canadian Thanksgiving dinner.

Surrounded by heavy security Joe and Jill arrived at our Bridle Path home. A virtual army of Secret Service and RCMP types surrounded our house. Bob had been slaving away all day getting a late Thanksgiving lunch ready.

It was wonderful to see Joe and Jill again. President Biden is a gracious and kind man. He brought us some squeaky toys and he picked up Dillie the Westie and I and gave us a pat on the head. Jill gave us a mincemeat pie baked by the White House kitchen staff.

We had invited Drake and Mr. Gordon Lightfoot to join us. The humans had a few glasses of wine from a British Columbia winery called Crescent Hill. President Biden loved their Mad Medusa Merlot and Jill liked their sparkling wine called Frizzante. As President Biden said this Canadian wine is going to give California a run for the money! President Biden liked the Mad Medusa so much he was going to order several cases for the White House wine cellar.

Mr. Gordon Lightfoot brought his guitar which delighted President Biden as he was a huge fan of “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald”. Drake rapped out a song as well. I could never have imagined such a crowd would be in our house. Happy conversation, laughing, the clinking of glasses and THE SMELL OF TURKEY!

President Biden said grace and it was moving as he thanked God for us all being together safe and sound. We all tucked in and everyone had seconds! Joe looks thin but boy he put a lot of turkey away. Dillie, Bosco and I had a special meal of white turkey meat, mashed potatoes and carrots. Our tummies were so full of this wonderful food we fell asleep. WE DOGS LOVE TURKEY! President Biden told a very funny story of how on American Thanksgiving he had to pardon a turkey and save its life. Americans can be so funny but I like them.

We had dessert of pumpkin pie and mincemeat pie with some wine from the island of Samos in Greece which was made with Muscat grapes. Again Joe and Jill said they never heard of this sweet wine but Bob said it had been famous for a very long time.

So Mr. Gordon Lightfoot kept us entertained and in a strange but wonderful combination Drake and Mr. Gordon Lightfoot sang a couple of songs! We wrapped up this long and exciting day at 11 when President Biden said he had to go to bed as he was off to Washington early in the morning.

I was in a deep sleep when President Biden said good-bye early in the morning saying to Dillie and I that we were always welcome to visit. He said we were SUCH GOOD DOGS. Oh my I suddenly thought of Karim and Anwar in the place beyond as President Biden shook my paw and Dillie’s saying what a good time he had. Politics just flew out my head for a day he said. Imagine an Egyptian rescue dog a good friend with an American President!

“Mutantism on the March” :Chapter 99 Quebec Occupied by English Canada (Again)

René Hecklevesque (aka Jiber) launched a whirlwind speaking tour of Quebec criticizing everyone but himself and the MSQ. How convenient the communiques of the FLQ demanded immediate elections in Quebec. In the turmoiled times the MSQ was becoming a hot political commodity. Public opinion polls gave it the edge over the Poorassa Liberal government. Get elected and create a galactical conquering army of zombified Quebecers. Jiber’s dream was inching closer to reality!

Once in power Jiber could launch a huge propaganda machine inculcating the public with an anti-America spirit. Destroy some American factories operating in Quebec and rough up some American tourists and senior executives of American corporations operating in Quebec. Jiber’s crew in Washington was successfully selling the idea that Quebec was being taken over by Marxists with possible ties to Cuba. The Jiber had signed an agreement with the big Kahuna himself President Richard Affliction. Affliction was to place pressure directly on the Poorassa Liberal government bypassing Ottawa and the proper diplomatic circles. Quebecers were to perceive themselves encircled by hostile Americans and English Canada and gather under the separatist banner of the MSQ. This vision of hostile encirclement was exactly what the Jiber required to surge into power and lead the province to the mercies of his conquering plans and to the Americans. Once installed into power a vitriolic campaign against Americans would be commenced. Once he had the Yanks believing their citizens and beloved McDonalds were under Marxist attack that would be sufficient to send the Marines in! Affliction receives his minerals and Jiber his army! Not bad at all!

If Jiber’s situation was optimistic it was made all the more favourable by the nervous federal government in Ottawa. Canadian Prime Mister Fauxdo was growing restless with the strife in his native province of Quebec. If he did not take action, and the Quebec provincial government certainly wasn’t going to, the country would consider him a weakling.

The Americans were very subdued in Ottawa diplomatic circles and that worried Fauxdo. The boys from Ontario were yelling for federal action to stem the communist hordes from gobbling up Quebec. The Vancouver, Toronto and Montreal stock exchanges were plummeting. Wealth was being whisked out of Canada to safe havens. It was time for drastic action. As Fauxdo had said to reporters, “Just watch me!”.

Speechwriters and comedians were given several hours to justify a rotten idea, the passing of the “War Pretension Act” which would permit the Canadian army to occupy Quebec and restore it to order. The law was quickly passed in Canadian Parliament and the troops were sent into La Belle Province.

Fauxdo’s address to the nation was long and impassioned justifying the passage of the War Pretensions Act as guaranteeing safety of free enterprise and democracy