RKS Literature: Somewhat of a Downward Slide in Life (Wally Lamb)

“Things had gone sharply downhill from the Port Authority bus terminal in New York when a hunchbacked old man had hobbled down the entire aisle, coming to rest with a sigh on the backseat next to me. From New York to Philadelphia, I sat yanking at Ma’s trench coat around me as he blew his nose and nibbled food from an oil spotted paper bag. I spent three hours on the same chapter of Valley of the Dolls, worrying that his garlic breath would seep into the fabric of Ma’s coat-that Kippy would smell his breath and think it was me.”

Wally Lamb, “She’s Come Undone”, 1992.

Vermont Terrorists Vandalize Tesla Dealership in Burlington, Vermont: Spoof News Services: South Hero, Vermont: 28March2025

Spoof has learnt a group of “terrorists” named The Green Mountain Boys attended a Tesla Dealership in Burlington, Vermont pouring Vermont maple syrup and nightcrawler earth over the shiny new Muskmobiles. Some vehicles had “11th Province” scrawled with lipstick on their windshields.

Sources close to Spoof say The Green Mountain Boys are Vermont successionists advocating Vermont becoming the 11th province of Canada.

Raids conducted by the Vermont National Guard at Tudhope’s Marina in North Hero, Vermont, The Alburg Golf and Country Club in Alburg, Vermont and a clandestine “compound” on Butler’s Island on Lake Champlain in the North Hero vicinity resulted in the seizure of 67 cases of Ontario and Quebec craft beer, 430 cans of Tim Horton’s coffee beans, 8 season’s tickets to Toronto Blue Jays baseball games and 43 pounds of peameal bacon. Numerous posters of hockey star Wayne Gretzky were found with an X written over Wayne’s beaming face while cuddling up to Republican politicians reading, “Stay in L.A. where you belong!”

A huge cache of Canadian flags was unearthed on Seagull Island proximate to Butler’s Island.

The Prime Minister of Canada Mike Carnut received an irate call from the White House displeased with yet unverified Canadian support for the “terrorists”. Carnut quipped, “We really really need Vermont as part of our country. The governor of Vermont would make an excellent mayor for our 11th province. We damn well need that Vermont maple syrup and cheddar cheese to make Canada Great Again!”

Just prior to publication rumors swirl in Washington about a trade which would have Alberta become the 51st state while Vermont becomes the 11th province of Canada.

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Wine: Peller Estates Private Reserve 2021 Meritage

From the Niagara region in Ontario, Canada we try a Peller Estates Private Reserve 2021 Meritage a blend of Cabernet Franc, Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot.

Aroma: Black cherry, blackberry, cassis with a strong black currant swirl.

Palate: The black currant continues to express itself as the predominant influence. Grippy tannins. Short brackish finish.

Personality: Big, tough and a bit rough on the edges like downtown Niagara Falls.

Food Match: A burger from the Flying Saucer Restaurant in Niagara Falls.

Cellarbility: Might continue to develop but don’t risk beyond 2027.

Price: $ 30 CDN.

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Wine Rating: 91/100. Wine Align Community Score 89.

(Peller Estates Private Reserve Meritage 2021, VQA Niagara-on-the-Lake, Peller Estates, Niagara-on-the-Lake, 750 mL, 13%).

Crazy8s: “The Reveal”: Sweet, Tender and Compassionate Sewn Nicely Together with a Chuckle: A Comedic Fairy Tale?

“The Reveal” if I may remark in a cheesy way using a word my Grade One teacher drilled in our young noggins never to write in a sentence is nice. It is also sweet, tender, compassionate and at times humorous. It operates in a dual universe of two different reveals.

The reveal is an event making Stevie a non-binary stand-up comedian (Emilee Nimentz) racked with anxiety as she is transitioning to a he commencing with testosterone injections. Stevie is “coming out!” a second time. The first was announcing she was a lesbian. (Man, these categories and pronouns are making me confused and probably guilty of misstatements just like Stevie’s father. Take your audience members and film critics as you find them please as their reality may be he and she).

Stevie’s sister Kate is hosting a baby reveal party where she and her partner Curtis will announce the gender of their soon to be born baby. What a time to announce to Stevie’s family she is transitioning.

The result is warm and fuzzy. Embraces and smiles. A fairy tale? Who knows but this is the movies so smile and enjoy the happy vibes. The stand-up comedy adds a degree of innovation to the short and is outrageously enjoyable.

You watch trailer here https://crazy8s.film/films/the-reveal/

Directed and written by Jackie Hoffart.

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Short Film Rating 83/100.

The Crazy8s Film Society is pleased to announce that this year’s host for their annual filmmaking challenge is award-winning Indigenous actress and director Grace Dove. The highly anticipated Crazy8s Gala event will take place at The Centre in Vancouver on March 29, 2025, with a star-studded afterparty at Science World. Crazy8s is an 8-day short filmmaking challenge and program that provides support and funding to six emerging filmmakers to produce a short film and then showcase it at the Gala.

Strange Afflictions Besiege White House in Washington: Sanaa, Yemen: Spoof Health News Services: 26March2025

Spoof reports a possible epidemic is sweeping Washington afflicting members of the Republican Party.

Dr. Gooey Gupta, prominent celebrity physician, speaking to The Association of Media Loving Physicians addressed the audience remarking, “I find it difficult to speak with confidence about what I am to tell you as the Centre for Disease Control is on its way to elimination and there is no independent data on health issues affecting Americans to be had. I had attempted to speak with the Secretary of Health but was unavailable being busy  watching “Curb Your Enthusiasm “ reruns.

The United States population, and for that matter the global population, is suffering from Trumpgression and Muskosis. This is a severe psychiatric situation and attempts to develop a vaccine have been unsuccessful. The only possible cure is to ensure DJT fails in his attempt to “secure” a third term in office which apparently Steve Bunions is “working on”.

A new health issue is affecting many American politicians in Washington somewhat akin to Tourettes Syndrome almost exclusively affecting Republican politicians. When asked their views on matters that could lead to critical thoughts about their leadership they involuntarily shout not obscenities but rather, “Liar! Sleazebag! False news!”

A secondary symptom would be “Denialosis” where possible “true facts” are hotly denied by a process of denigration of any bearer of possible “true facts”.

Spoof notes that Dr. Gupta was booed off the stage with cries of, “Liar! Sleazebag”. The prior speaker had been discussing massive income tax cuts promised by the current Administration for American physicians.

Spoof is hot on this story and will update you with emerging details as they become known.

RKS 2025 Film: “Misericordia”: Anger, Violence, Guilt and Lustcentric Blind Eyes

Jérémie Pastor (Félix Kysyl), an unemployed baker from Toulouse, returns to his native country village to attend the funeral of his former boss and town baker J.P. Rigal. A one-night stay at widower Martine Rigal’s (Catherine Frot) extends itself to no set date.

Vincent Rigal (Jean-Baptiste Durand) expresses hostility then violence towards Pastor thinking he wants to cozy up with Martine his mother so he can then sleep with her. At one point fighting with Pastor he knocks him to the ground saying leave this town or else. Pastor then retaliates to the point it would appear there is an uneasy stalemate.

Pastor makes some sexual moves on grubby and obese Walter (David Ayala) infuriating Walter who chases him out of his house shooting a rifle in the escaping Pastor’s direction.

Amidst this aggression and violence a murder (or perhaps an act of self-defence) is committed and the body buried in the forest.

Guess who’s coming to dinner!

The facts gradually point to who the murderer is but due to heavy currents of hetro and homo lust swirling about the obvious truth pointing to the killer the obvious is ignored in blind eye fashion. A bizarre philosophical and lustful abbey (Jacques Develay) adds to the complications.  Martine is shyly lustful. Pastor is lustful. Walter is lustful pretending not to be. The gendarmes are lustful and diabolical not sexually but in hot pursuit of the killer. Vincent is not lustful but fatally hot headed. The killer is racked by Raskolnikovian guilt and ready to jump off a cliff overlooking a beautiful autumnal forest he is saved by godly lust!

In Misericordia does lust foster sets of blind eyes? It seems so. Forget the whodunit in the film as we viewers already know the identity of the murderer.

This film by Alain Guiraudie nominated for 7 César Awards including best film and best director.

Joint French/Spanish/Portuguese production.

You can watch the trailer here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wk2SgBIoF4

Theatrical release of the film commences in Canada 28March2025.

RKS 2025 Film Rating 72/100.

RKS Wine: Moving Beyond The Great American Pull to Develop the Canadian Wine Industry

One result of Trumpian aggression towards Canada has been The Great American Pull removing American alcohol products from Canadian liquor stores. A quasi Nouveau Prohibition.

Patriotic Canadians can clap, cheer and make a “sacrifice” foregoing Californian wine foistered upon them by profit driven liquor control boards luxuriating in easy profits from customers they have historically indoctrinated by offering shelves loaded with Californian, Oregonian and Washington State wines.

Looking at the Vintages shelves in a Liquor Control Board of Ontario store even in those proudly bearing the moniker “flagship store” Ontario wines are dwarfed by ex-Canadian wines. Despite wobbly and insincere statements about promoting Ontario wines the truth is ex-Canada rules! Even Ontario wines suffer from Niagara imperialism crowding out Prince Edward County and Lake Erie North Shore wines. Where are the wines from Nova Scotia, British Columbia and Quebec?

How then to promote Canadian wines given this golden opportunity to seize the moment and truly foster Canadian wineries?

Much talk exists about removing the barriers of interprovincial trade that has had the SAQ in Quebec and the LCBO stomping their feet like angry toddlers where interprovincial orders by customers are placed. Courier companies threatened when they deliver such orders. Let’s get working on reducing interprovincial barriers to trade. No need to arrest that poor fellow bringing in a couple of cases of beer purchased in Quebec across the New Brunswick-Quebec border!

Geez! Given there is no Muskian DOGE movement to “rationalize” provincial liquor monopolies can we expect some pedal to the metal action by Canadian federal political parties developing platforms for the upcoming 28April2025 Canadian federal election?

Should any of these parties form the next Canadian government what positive steps are promised to promote Canadian wines?  I have asked the Liberal party, the Conservative party and the New Democratic party their plans to promote Canadian wine in their electoral platforms. No reply yet. Will I wait until hell freezes over?

My interactions with wineries in Ontario and British Columbia point to a near total lack of a provincial or federal wine promotion budget.

I was invited to attend the first Wine and Travel Week Conference in Porto in 2023. Various wine producing associations, wineries and tourism boards were present to promote their products, regions, wine routes and touristic sites. Gala dinners with Michelin starred restaurants. Presentations. Individual one on one meetings. Three days of travel to visit wineries, gastronomic and touristic sites in one of 6 Portuguese wine producing areas. In the exhibition area with the “vendors” not a bottle of wine in sight. The focus was on wine tourism.

Wine tourism does not consist of drawing visitors to wineries as face it how many wineries can you visit. At some point, cellars, tasting rooms, merchandise and tours are repetitive. In the wine tourism concept the goal is a total package consisting of the winery, gastronomy and touristic sites.

Many Canadian wineries are aware of the concept of wine tourism. They strive to bring “wine tourists” for more than the basic winery type tour/offerings to include accommodation, music, movies in the vineyard, yoga and cooking classes.

The European Union has a huge wine tourism budget that includes bringing international media and tour operators on a FAM (no cost) basis to visit wineries, nearby tourist sites and restaurants in the wine region to promote the region as a package. Each component of the package feeds off each other in a symbiotic relationship.

Isn’t it time for some governmental money, be it municipal, provincial or federal to promote Canadian wine tourism? Shouldn’t tourism boards, chambers of commerce, restaurants and wineries take an integrated as approached to a siloed approach?

Bring Canadian and foreign journalists to various Canadian wine producing regions to showcase wineries, tourist sights and local gastronomy. Canadian wine regions have more to offer than musty smells, tasting rooms and eateries as they have an entire geographic area that should have international appeal.

I was embarrassed at this Wine and Travel Week event I attended when several people asked why Canada and/or its wine regions was not present. What could I say but responding that was an interesting question. The answer is either ignorance or lack of money most likely more of the latter.

Those who care about the Canadian economy to which Canadian wineries contribute to in spin off benefits, wages and taxes should be asking their brave provincial and federal governments their plans to promote Canadian wine tourism that transcend platitudes and provide a well thought out programme and cash. Follow the money!

Crazy8s: “My Mother the Zombie”: Teenage Lust in Threatening Overdrive Meets Mother Zombie

Running since 1999, Crazy8s is an annual 8-day short filmmaking challenge providing support and funding to 6 emerging and mid-career filmmakers to produce a short film and provides training opportunities to crew and cast. After a Gala Screening and Afterparty, the films go on to be seen by audiences worldwide at film festivals and on other distribution channels.

Kiera (Sophie Thom) is a shy 14-year-old teen unsure of herself often nervously scratching her nail polish off her fingers. Is the shyness a result of her mother being a zombie? Zombies require fresh meat and Kiera goes hunting for mother zombie’s dinner by shooting birds with a slingshot.

In this short mother zombie can be said to be hunting for Kiera and she’s really going to satisfy her appetite for some time.

Thom earns her chops as an actress here including some captivating facial expressions, professionalism seemingly well beyond her 14 years.

Screening at Crazy8s’ Gala on 29March2025 in Vancouver.

Directed by Samantha Pineda and written by Loretta Seto.

RKS Canadian Short Film Rating 91/100.

You can see the full slate of Crazy8s’ shorts at their 29March2025 gala in Vancouver.

Watch the trailer here https://crazy8s.film/films/my-mother-the-zombie/

RKS 2025 Wine: Bargain Priced Portuguese Wine: Evel Tinto from the Douro

The Evel “brand” was born in 1913.

The grapes in this Evel Tinto are from three different quintas two of which are cool climate and the third warm climate. It is a blend of Tinta Roriz (30%), Touriga Franca (30%), Tinta Barroca (30%) and Touriga Nacional (10%). Fermentation was in stainless steel vats and was aged in French oak vats for eight months prior to bottling.

At $14.95 what quality can it deliver? Plenty.

Aroma: Raspberry, black cherry, dried cranberry, blueberry with discrete oak notes.

Palate: Creeping but gentle tannins. Smooth with just the tiniest edge to it particularly on its moderately long finish. Strawberry and raspberry with just a hint of raspberry jam. The wine on the palate seems more leaning towards excellent structure as opposed to a plenitude of fruits.

Personality: Smooth operator I am. Not elegant just smooth and easy down the hatch.

Food Match: Cod in a tomato sauce with onions, garlic, capers and olives. Perhaps with the never-ending number of recipes in Portugal for bacalhau perhaps what is described above can be a bacalhau! Red wine with fish? Certainly, with many bacalhau variations!

Cellarbility: Consume in 2025.

Price: $14.95 CDN.

RKS 2025 Wine Rating: 88/100. Wine Align community score 88.

(Evel Tinto 2021 Douro, Douro D.O.C., Real Companhia Vela, V.N.D.G, Portugal, 750 ml, 13.5%).

(Poetry Break): It is Rude to Mock Those with Dementia

We must not mock those suffering from dementia
I caught a clip of some comedian hawking virtual cards about the orange toad
Had a great laugh about the mocking of a twit specializing in bankruptcy and failed coups
like a kamikaze pilot taking out the enemy
then
someone told me this was not a joke
Not a Saturday Night Live Skit
but a real live twit
Isn’t it time to realize
perhaps
that this man
needs some help
but suggest that and millions of followers
will begin to yelp
man it is obvious this international embarrassment is in dire need of help!
A performer in “Nightmare Alley” ?

Robert K. Stephen