Poetry Corner: ” Is it possible to go fishing after your funeral?”

Is it possible to go fishing after your funeral?

the gnawing worms
probably reached you by now
can you be but a pleasant memory
or are you there as I string you on my hook?

Robert K. Stephen

Poetry Corner

All in a Day’s Work

The surly vodka vapoured foreman
hastily retreats
in a flaming pink neon shirt
confidently sucking clacking dentures
and Mr. Milo racks up his total
of seven unfiltered Player’s
smoked and held in orange nicotine stained fingers in silent terror in a corner of the factory floor
Thank God for the small breaks in Life!

Robert K. Stephen


Life at Up Up and Away Investment Management International: Chapter 30 Off to the psychiatrist for Tony Hornet

Chapter 30

Off to the psychiatrist for Tony Hornet!

Who can ever believe they are to visit a psychiatrist? Well, I will admit for me it was time to pay a visit to a psychiatrist at a major downtown hospital. It was very odd getting off at the eighth floor of this hospital and walking into the Department of Psychiatry. Then waiting in the hall to see my psychiatrist.  Geez I sure had some problems to deal with but was being mentally ill one of them? You must remember as a child of the 1950’s and 1960’s the words divorce, homosexuality and psychiatry were nasty words!

Dr. Ellen Wong was right to the point and a very good listener. She looked you in the eye and only occasionally took notes. Within 5 minutes my initial freak out subsided. My comfort level shot up quickly. She asked a boatload of questions to get to know me better.

When she asked me why I thought I was there I told the story of my various health issues and how threatened I felt at work. I felt by continuing to work I was putting my life in peril. The volume and complexity of work was becoming unmanageable. I felt like there was an impending heart attack around the next corner.

To make matters worse one of my colleagues, Stella Asterix, was off on her third long term disability due to a chronic disease and guess who was filling in for her? I was coming home so exhausted I was in bed by 7 p.m. and waking up equally exhausted. It so happened that Dr. Wong sent me to an endocrinologist as in her blood test that she ordered there were low levels of TSH. The endocrinologist immediately pinpointed the issue as a well-known side effect of Amiodarone, subclinical hyperthyroidism, with exhaustion and heart palpitations being an unpleasant side effect as well as an increased chance of developing anxiety and depression. No medication was prescribed and in a month I returned to a somewhat normal energy level. I had been under much medical and work induced stress this was the last thing I needed.

I really admired Dr. Wong for focusing at least initially on some of the physical problems I was having. She set me up with a new GP for a thorough physical, ordered comprehensive blood tests, ordered a sleep test, sent me to a neurologist and a lung specialist. And to my delight no pills at least for the moment.

Before each session I had with her I completed a “Beck Depression Inventory” wherein certain questions about your mood and anxiety were measured and easily calculated. The higher the score the more likelihood you were suffering from depression and or anxiety.

I saw Dr. Wong each week and in week 5 she said it was her opinion that I was suffering from workplace stress and anxiety and possibly cognitive impairment due to the 14 years of atrial fibrillation resulting in micro-embolisms caused by the atrial fibrillation. I can’t say the stress and anxiety was a surprise but the micro-embolisms and cognitive impairment were worrisome. She set me up with a psychotherapist and a neurologist to do specialized cognitive testing that there was a two-year waiting list for. And she ordered an MRI for the brain for which there was a seven-month waiting period. And to top things off she got me enrolled in an experimental mindfulness session the hospital was offering.

About week 7 she told me I was suffering from depression and this was based on the consistently high scores I had on the Beck Depression Inventory and from her personal observations. This diagnosis was hard to swallow and I still wonder if it was true.  Dr. Wong also had me see her colleague for a second opinion which confirmed Dr. Wong’s diagnosis was correct. An initial neurological exam administered during the “second opinion” visit also confirmed my cognitive abilities were not where they should be but that would be confirmed or rejected by a more sophisticated test later.

Things at work were not going well. I revealed to Sally Self my psychiatric diagnosis and pleaded for some experienced help from our legal department in New York. Instead of experienced help I got a junior lawyer nice and eager but with no relevant and helpful ability. I pointed this out to Sally Self who said she could do no more

Things were getting so tight at Up Up and Away Toronto you needed to obtain the permission of the General Counsel of Up Up and Away New York to go on a business trip and probably to blow your nose. Morale was rock bottom. Stress levels were sky high due to a huge flow of project work. Up Up and Away New York had failed a U.S. regulatory inspection and was running scared and creating mountains of legal work to escape severe financial penalties. And me suffering from a litany of physical and psychological problems. The mindfulness had helped for a time but the stress was becoming so overwhelming I had vague thoughts of ending it all if you know what I mean and it was not quitting.

My psychotherapist patiently listened to my problems and gave encouraging advice. Her brother was working for a largecorp and running into severe stress issues so she caught on quickly. She was a good listener and we really talked out my work-related stress and what my options were. It was clear I was working in a very unhealthy environment. So unhealthy it was looking like it was deadly.

Canadian COVIDpolitics: Differing Responses and Differing Moral Codes

I have said it will take decades for historians, political scientists, psychologists, psychiatrists and academics to figure what the fuck went on the societal and political front during COVID-19.

Until then it is a shit show of interpretation to figure out if there is consistency in Canadian politics as far as COVIDpolitics rumbles.

As “Trailer Park Boys” is no longer shooting perhaps we should take a trailer park view of the recent shit show in Canadian politics and enjoy its rum n coke analysis of Ricki and Mr. Lahey!

In Ontario the rum n coke is flowing with recent events. Minister of Finance Rod Phillips took a 3-week vacation to St. Bart’s apparently only telling Premier Doug Ford several days after he left yet Ford did nothing until it would seem he was caught with his pants down after the media sniffed out Phillip’s cavortations at St. Bart’s. Phillips “resigned”. Ford apologized for not ordering Phillips back to Ontario. Philipps apologized for his “dumb dumb mistake”. At the end of the day Phillips is thrown under the bus.

Yet while Minister of Finance Phillips made a moral mistake of departing Ontario in the face of the politico-medico’s view of stay at home and travel for essential purposes he did not break any laws perhaps only politico-medico recommendations. No one was harmed. Sort of Like Kim Mitchell’s song “Drink a Soda and no one Dies”.

Yet under the watch of Ontario’s Merrille Fullerton (Minister of Long Term Care) and Christine Elliot (Minister of Health) hundreds of elderly Ontario residents have died in long-term care facilities. Yet they retain their ministerial posts. Premier Ford WTF is going on?

Premier Ford….time for an election. You knew Phillips was out of the province but you only apologize when you are “exposed”?

Now we have Niki Ashton of the federal NDP who was visiting a sick relative in Greece and the not so progressive federal New Democratic Party a socialist party demotes her from her shadow cabinet position. How gutless and politically correct.

Then there is Tracy Allard with the United Conservative party in Alberta. Off on a vacation only telling United Conservative Party Premier after she had left for a glorious Hawaiian vacation. Premier Jason Kenney at least had the guts to say it was his fault for not leaving a clear directive to members of his cabinet not to leave Alberta but said if you leave after I tell you not to leave you are toast.

One has the feeling there are many pieces of toast in the toaster and it is only when they pop up will they will be identified.

Canadian politics…..at least not the hatred of American political vitriol…..not quite yet!

Ontario COVIDpoltics

OK. Canada a beacon of reasonability. Supposedly Canadians are a harmonious nation which may be true in comparison to bloodbath of acrimony and lunacy in American politics that will soon come to an end as President elect Biden is finally sworn in despite the efforts of mongrel Trump to save his ego and destroy American democracy. To my American friends you elected the mongrel perhaps you deserve his dying barks. Actually, speaking of dogs Trump as the orange toad is the first president in the United States in 130 years to not have a pet in the White House!

Minister of Health in Ontario Elliot

Yes but here in Canada we are so much more civilized. We simply have exploited and abused our aboriginal population for close to 400 years. And we dare hold ourselves above the slave trader markets in Georgia?

Well at least as COVIDpoltics go on a federal and provincial level we have some degree of harmony in how to manage COVID. The Canadian federal government and provincial governments are acting is an almost harmony.

Merrielee Fullerton Ontario Minister of Long Term Care

Of late COVIDpoltics is starting to take its toll in Canadian politics but not on a federal vs. state/provincial level but within political parties.

Of late is Ontario Minister of Finance Rod Phillips who made the political error of heading off to St. Barts for a three-week vacation only telling Ontario Premier Doug Ford after he was enjoying the sun and waves he was enjoying a nice tropical vacation. This was at a time all citizens of Ontario were being told to stay at home perhaps like you and me having a lonely Christmas and New Year’s repast which I hope will never happen again in my lifetime.

It would seem that Ontario Premier Ford was notified by Phillips after he had left he was out of the province of Ontario. Premier Ford could have said haul your ass back to Ontario but he did not and for that he admits to yet another “personal mistake”. Seems to me he has made a few himself as regards COVID. Yet Phillips appears as a sacrificial lamb. He may have broken some moral code but no legal restrictions. Bad judgement perhaps but as Premier Ford let him cavort on the sandy beaches it was only when “exposed” that Phillips “resigned”.

On the other hand Minister of Health Christine Elliott and Minister of Long Term Care Fullerton cavort unscathed where under their watch hundreds have died in long term care facilities in Ontario. Yet Premier Ford protects and shields them. Phillips has killed no one yet he is axed from his ministerial portfolio. A lapse in moral judgement is more severe than ministers responsible for the health of seniors?  This stinks of hypocrisy and as for political accountability it should be good- bye to Premier Ford, Minister Elliot and Fullerton.

At one point many of us Ontarians had a grudging respect for Premier Ford. But this time it is clear he has thrown Phillips under the bus yet Fullerton and Elliot watch the bus run over Phillips with relief etched on their faces.

Premier Ford has had his sacrificial lamb but he might have better sacrificed Minister Elliot and Fullerton and perhaps himself. Time for an election you say?

Plagueolitics

We have all heard so much about COVID-19 from all levels of government throughout the globe. Incessant chatter it would seem. In my next serialized novel “Virus #26” you’ll witness my take on politics and COVID-19.

The full impact of COVID-19 on us as individuals, on society, on the medical establishment and on the political and ideological system may not be really known or understood for decades. But as a political scientist I can assure you universities will be crammed with COVIDolitics, COVID psychology, COVID history and on and on. Hundreds of books will be written of an academic nature on COVID–19 and perhaps even more encompassing and of value on Plagueolitics.

COVID-19 is just the current plague but there has been bubonic plague, Swine Flu, Spanish Flu, SARS, MERS and many more to come as humankind destroys its ecosystem so it may very well destroy itself.

Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately) I did not pursue a career in academia. But perhaps there is time to obtain a PHD and MA in political science and teach it at some esteemed university? Of course, I am opening to receiving an honorary doctorate in political science and teach my new course “Plagueolitics 101”.

Here is my outline;

  • A brief history of humankind plagues
  • The politics of each plague
  • The role of government in each plague
  • The formation of the politico-medico elite
  • The role of politico-medico propaganda
  • The erosion of democratic rights
  • Did the media inform the populace or brainwash it
  • Was the scientific community subject to repression and censorship?
  • The glorification of “plague fighters”
  • The inaccuracies of the politico-medico party line
  • How Big Pharma exploited the various later day plagues 
  • What the plagues teach us about the past and how to avoid mistakes in the future
  • Who are the true heroes and villains?

Life at Up Up and Away Investment Management International: Chapter 29 The beginning of the end for Tony Hornet

Chapter 29

The beginning of the end for Tony Hornet

A high percentage of Canadians do not reach the unofficial retirement age of 65 as they succumb to a variety of health issues or due to ageism they are terminated. I suppose 11 years at CRAP and 19 at Up Up and Away Toronto took their toll on me. Too many heart pounding big deals, too many late nights and not enough sleep were taking a silent toll on me.

About three years into working at Up Up and Away Toronto I recall having a leisurely conversation with a colleague close to Christmas time. My heart stopped for second, then for a few seconds sped up but soon went back to its normal rhythm. Needless to say this was a disconcerting. It began to happen more frequently so I asked my GP about it and he seemed to brush it off as no big deal. According to my doctor the condition was called atrial fibrillation and many of his patients had it. If the heart did not start beating normally, he said very nonchalantly that I should go to “Emergency” and they would put me out and then I would undergo a cardioversion by way of an electric shock which would cause my heart to return to its normal sinus rhythm. A lack of compassion so common amongst physicians.

Well one morning about 3.a.m.my heart started beating wildly. It was my first full blown atrial fibrillation attack, so I hopped in a taxi and headed to Emergency. After about 6 hours of this wild cardiac ride they were about ready to put me out and give my heart a blast of electricity but just as soon as the episode started it then ended without the need for electricity. Being absent from work I had to spill the beans about this condition to Sally Self.

I suffered from atrial fibrillation for 14 years. Despite some awful drugs being offered to me the attacks worsened to the point they were at least twice a week and would last for 7-8 hours. This was extremely bothersome if the episode spanned into working hours and often it did. But I kept it quiet except for advising Sally and really suffered terribly. Atrial fibrillation may also have side effects of anxiety, depression and cognitive impairment.

The last drug I tried was Amiodarone which was a rate control drug. It was highly effective but highly toxic and dangerous. I was also taking Eliquis a mega blood thinner that made me a borderline hemophiliac. Those with atrial fibrillation are 4-5 times more likely to suffer from strokes due to clotting because of the stopping and starting of the heart. Clots blocking the flow of blood in the brain are the cause of strokes. Blood thinners are usually prescribed to avoid deadly or debilitating strokes.

I had an awful time converting to amiodarone as your system had to be clear of cardiac drugs for two weeks and the dosage of amiodarone required a month or so before being topped up to a full dose. So for 6 weeks my heart was acting up. It was unbearable. Upon retrospection I should have gone on short term disability during this extremely uncomfortable and challenging time.

There is a medical procedure called a cardiac ablation where the rogue heart tissue causing the arrhythmia are burnt off. Why my cardiologists failed to tell me was this procedure was relatively safe and extraordinarily successful was a puzzle to me until I saw an Ontario Hospital Insurance Plan policy urging cardiologists to pump out the drugs as a cardiac ablation costs approximately $60.000.

I think the breaking point was a possible mini-stroke I had. I was shaving and my shaving hand was not responding to what I wanted it to do. As well I had difficulty combing my hair. I phoned 911 and an ambulance transported me to Emergency. Was it a mini stroke? The neurologist ordered an MRI and no damage was found. Neither was there any firm medical pronouncement as to whether a mini stroke had occurred. Suffering the gnawing fear that a severe stroke was a possibility I visited my electro physiologist, the cardiac speciality physician that performs cardiac ablations, and asked for a cardiac ablation.

Several months later I had the cardiac ablation and the procedure lasted for 4 hours and over 100 burns were made to my heart. I still had to remain on the amiodarone for six more months. I am happy to say the cardiac ablation worked. On rare instances I get a few seconds of irregular heart beats. Unfortunately, research is surfacing showing that a cardiac ablation, because it is blasting heart tissue, may create “debris” that floats up in the blood to the brain causing brain lesions and cognitive impairment.

I must say sitting at my desk at Up Up and Away Toronto I began to think the stressful work I did was bad for my health. I felt a bit like a sitting duck waiting for a fatal shotgun blast. And the workplace stress was gaining in intensity.

After all these years no cardiologist or medical practitioner, save the neurologist seeing me after the mini stroke, ever asked me how I was feeling psychologically despite the fact there was unmistakable evidence that atrial fibrillation significantly increases the risk of anxiety, depression and cognitive impairment. I was feeling that the medical establishment had failed me. Speaking with friends in the United States cardiac ablations were far more common there than in Canada. When they heard I waited for 14 years to have one they were in disbelief. For them their wait had been weeks.

I explained to the neurologist following up on me after the possible mini stroke the stressful situation I was working in and if it was dangerous to me. The anxiety about another mini stroke induced by stress was beginning to gnaw at me. His response seeing my anxiety was that it was time to see a psychiatrist. Of course, hearing the word” psychiatrist” initially flipped me out but after a moment of reflection I accepted his referral to a hospital psychiatrist by the name of Dr. Ellen Wong.

I needed a month to recover from my cardiac ablation so had to go on short term disability. Boy I had a nasty “caseworker” from our short-term disability administrator, Happy Insurance Company. Aggressive in tone and attitude. My electro physiologist made the mistake of writing to Happy Insurance Company stating “if possible” Tony should have one month to recover. “If possible” meant two weeks to that bastard of an insurance company caseworker. Neither did Sally Self or our Human Resources Department give me any support to give me the month I required to heal despite a request I made for their intervention. At this point I was beginning to take matters personally. The apathy and lack of concern by Up Up and Away Toronto and Sally Self for my health was highly offensive.

To top things off shortly after returning to work from the cardiac ablation I was diagnosed with Essential Tremor or ET as it is known. What ET does is make you shaky. There is surgery but only for the worst cases. So yet more medication to take. The neurologist who diagnosed the ET found evidence of microangiopathic disease on the brain. This can lead to stroke and is an early maker for dementia and Alzheimer’s.

Having to deal with all these medical issues in a toxic workplace was becoming increasingly difficult.

Magnesium and stroke risk

The relationship between dietary magnesium intake, stroke and its major risk factors, blood pressure and cholesterol, in the EPIC-Norfolk cohort

Lucy K M Bain 1, Phyo K Myint 2, Amy Jennings 3, Marleen A H Lentjes 4, Robert N Luben 4, Kay-Tee Khaw 4, Nick J Wareham 4, Ailsa A Welch 5Affiliations expand

Free PMC article

Abstract

Background: Dietary magnesium could modify the major stroke risk factors, high blood pressure (BP) and cholesterol, but has been understudied in both sexes in a single population. This study aimed to investigate if dietary magnesium intake was associated with BP, total cholesterol (TC) and incident stroke risk in an adult population.

Methods: We conducted cross-sectional analyses in a case-cohort study of 4443, men and women aged 40-75, representative of 25,639 participants years of the EPIC (European Prospective Investigation into Cancer)-Norfolk cohort. The cohort included 928 stroke cases (42,556.5 person years). Dietary data from 7 day food diaries were analysed using multivariate regression to assess associations between quintiles or data-derived categories of dietary magnesium intake and BP, TC and stroke risk, adjusted for relevant confounders.

Results: We observed differences of -7 mmHg systolic BP (P trend ≤ 0.01) and -3.8 mmHg diastolic BP (P trend=0.01) between extreme intakes of magnesium in men, a significant inverse association with TC was observed (P trend=0.02 men and 0.04 women). Compared to the bottom 10%, the top 30% of magnesium intake was associated with a 41% relative reduction in stroke risk (HR 0.59; 95% CI 0.38-0.93) in men.

Conclusions: Lower dietary magnesium intake was associated with higher BP and stroke risk, which may have implications for primary prevention.

Keywords: Blood pressure; Dietary magnesium; Stroke; Total cholesterol.

Mira Lehr Exhibit Planetary Visions to end January 16th at Rosenbaum Contemporary Gallery in Boca Raton Florida

Who is Mira Lehr? You can catch a virtual tour of her exhibit here https://www.rosenbaumcontemporary.com/exhibitions/108/video/

Her biography is below;

About the Artist . . .
Mira Lehr’s solo and group exhibitions number more than 300. She is a graduate of Vassar College (1956) with a degree in Art History, under the mentorship of Linda Nochlin, the renowned feminist art historian.
She has been collected by major institutions across the U.S., including the Smithsonian Museum of American Art (Washington), the Getty Museum Research Center (Los Angeles), the Boca Raton Museum of Art, the Perez Art Museum (Miami), the Frances Lehman Loeb Art Center (NY), and by The Margulies Collection, among many others.  
Her work is in the private collections of Elie and Marion Wiesel, Jane and Morley Safer, and the artist Judy Pfaff, among others. 
Lehr is included in the prestigious Leonard Lauder Corporate Collection in New York. Thirty of her paintings were commissioned for the permanent collection of Mount Sinai Hospital. 
Her work can be seen in American Embassies around the world and is permanently on view in the lobby of the Evelyn Lauder Breast Center of the Sloan Kettering Memorial Center.
Perfect Flight, by Mira Lehr (burned and dyed Japanese paper, ink and acrylic on canvas), 2020.
Her recent solo exhibition headlined Art Basel Miami Beach 2019 at the Jewish Museum of Florida, and received national and international critical acclaim.
Lehr’s 2020 solo museum show at the Mennello Museum of American Art was selected by ArtNet News and The New York Times as one of their selections among the leading museum exhibitions in 2020 in the United States. 
Her museum-wide exhibition at the MOCA Museum in North Miami spanned across 10,000 square feet of installations. She has currently been chosen by Flying Horse Editions as an invited artist for a major project this year.
Lehr’s nature-based work encompasses painting, sculpture and video. She uses non-traditional media such as gunpowder, fire, Japanese paper, dyes and welded steel. Lehr is known for igniting and exploding fuses to create lines of fire across her paintings.
Dance, by Mira Lehr, 8’ x 12’, (burned and dyed Japanese paper, acrylic and ink on wood panel ), 2020.
Critics are calling Lehr “the Godmother of Miami’s art scene” because in 1960 she created one of the nation’s first co-ops for women artists, in 1960.
At the age of 86 and with a career that spans more than six decades of artmaking, Lehr is creating more new work now than at any other point in her life ─ with a heightened sense of urgency about the planet and climate change.
In the 1950s, Lehr studied and worked in New York as an artist, where she met some of America’s most prominent masters including: Joan Mitchell, Lee Krasner, and Helen Frankenthaler. She studied with James Brooks, Ludwig Sander, Robert Motherwell, and within the Hans Hofmann circle. 
When Lehr moved back to Florida in 1960, she was shocked at the lack of an art scene, especially for women. She convinced many of the masters from New York to visit and lead workshops for her league of women artists. This helped the evolution of art in Florida. 
She was selected in 1969 by Buckminster Fuller, as one of only two artists, to participate in his World Game Project about sustainability and his groundbreaking “Spaceship Earth” concept which preceded the world’s very first Earth Day in 1970. 
Lehr’s video installation, V1 V3, was on view at the New Museum, NY. Her work has been included in numerous art fairs during Art Basel Miami Beach, including Art Miami, Pinta Art Fair and INK. 
She was the recipient of the Vizcaya Museum Lost Spaces Commission, where she was commissioned to create a site-specific installation by the Vizcaya Museum & Gardens as part of Vizcaya’s centennial celebration.