“Lost in Puppydom: Rory Dylan Stephen’s Puppydom”: TERROR ON A SUBURBAN STREET: COYOTE CONFRONTATION!

TERROR ON A SUBURBAN STREET: COYOTE CONFRONTATION!

Remember the Seinfeld episode where Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer were in a certain contest that had some reference to being masters in their domain?

I am master of my backyard domain as there I am the hunter. Squirrells, opossums and rabbits are my prey.

Last night I was in another’s domain and I was the hunted.

At 23:15 Bob and I head out the front door for our final walk. At this time of the night we occasionally encounter Snipsy or Jasper a couple of my canine friends.

As we headed down the steps we encountered an unleashed dog I didn’t recognize just ahead of us on the other side of the street. Bob immediately started yelling and clapping his hands. Something was amiss! I sensed DANGER! This was no dog but a coyote! I am 12 pounds now and face it but a shrimp against this savage brute. A killer. A demon. A maniac. A scourge on the canine population specializing in luring then attacking finishing off my brethren.

The coyote moved down the street to the next house. Bob and I stayed motionless, but the coyote started slinking toward us until Bob shouted, screamed and clapped causing the brute to back off. We backed up slowly facing the monster. Bob clapped and screamed again and the coyote backed off. It slowly moved towards us until it was at the end of the driveway some 20 feet away. I could feel its hot, fetid and menacing breath down my neck.  We made it to the front door. Alive and shook up.

I heard a few naughty words from Bob upset with our adventure.

Up to bed. I was put in my crate but I kept visualizing that scrawny and vicious creature so I began to cry and Bob opened the crate and I hopped up on the bed and unlike me gave him a multitude of kisses. We have had our differences over midnight romps in the snow disobeying the COME COMMAND but when I am fearful or in discomfort he is always there. I wiggled up to his chest as he sweet talked me to sleep assuring me everything was OK.

My advice to you when facing a coyote and it is stalking you is to pull out a Glock and shoot the bastard between the eyes. Failing possession of a Glock, which is hard to believe with truckloads of them from the United States pouring into Canada, stare it right in the eye, shout/scream/clap and hope for the best and do not turn your back nor run.

The City of Toronto is goo goo ga ga over coyotes in the “urban ecological system” unless of course some poor dog or human is mauled or killed. I say defund those lousy coyote lovers!

RKS Literature: Truman Capote Muses on Japanese Food (Truman Capote)

“The steak was excellent; Japanese take a just pride in the quality of their beef. The spaghetti, a dish popular in Japan was not; nor was the rest-the conglomeration of peas, potatoes and beans. Granted the menu was a queer one, it is on the whole a mistake to order Western food in Japan, yet there arise those moments when one retches at he thought of more raw fish, sukiyaki, and rice with seaweed, when, however temptingly they may be prepared and however prettily presented, the unaccustomed stomach revolts at the prospect of eel broth and fried beans and pickled snake and octopus arms.”

Truman Capote, “The Duke in His Domain”, 1957.

RKS Literature: The Entertaining and Typical Drunk (Yoshida Kenkō)

“All things considered, a drunkard is so entertaining he can be forgiven his sins. Think of the charming scene when a master throws open the door on his servant, who is sound asleep next morning after an exhausting night on the drink. The poor befuddled fellow rushes off, rubbing his bleary eyes, topknot exposed on his hatless head, only half dressed and clutching the rest of his trailing clothes. His hairy shins sticking below his lifted skirts as he scampers into the distance-a typical drunk.”

Yoshida Kenkō, “A Cup of Sake Beneath the Cherry Trees”, 1329-1331?

RKS Literature: Loathsome but Hard to Resist a Cup of Sake (Yoshida Kenkō)

“Yet, as loathsome though one finds it, there are situations where a cup of sake is hard to resist. On a moonlit night, a snowy morning, or beneath flowering cherry trees, it increases all the pleasures of the moment to bring out the sake cups and settle down to talk serenely together over a drink. It is also a great comfort to have a drink together if an unexpected friend calls round when time is hanging heavy on your hands. And it is quite wonderful when sake is served from behind the curtains by some remote and exalted lady.”

Yoshida Kenkō, “A Cup of Sake Beneath the Cherry Trees”, 1329-1331?

RKS 2026 EURO Wine: Château Le Cap 2022 From Bordeaux: Operation Epic Fury Blackberry and Black Cherry

Aroma: It murmurs black fruit. Nothing ostentatious or flashy but then not playing hard to get. It is there. Buried in the core but not so deep a Trump Bunker Buster can’t obliterate it! In addition to the Operation Epic Fury blackberry and black cherry some licorice and vanilla.

Palate: Moderately tannic. Acids are out of balance and temper the outstanding wine the nose was led to believe. Will the acids calm with more bottle age? They do not calm with decanting. Restrict consumption to foods.

Personality: I smell nice but don’t deliver on the palate.

Cellarbility: No Sleepy Joe here. Neither a short nor full nap will improve the wine.

Food Match: A Friday night wine……code for you know what.

Price: $19 CDN.

RKS 2026 EURO Wine Rating: 81/100. Roger Voss,  Wine Enthusiast 91.

(Château Le Cap 2022, AOC Blaye Côtes de Bordeaux, Vignobles Carreau, Cars, France, 750 mL, 14.5%).

Tasted 4April2026

RKS Literature: Wine the Path to Hell (Yoshida Kenkō)

“Wine has been called the ‘greatest of medicines’, but in fact all sickness springs from it. It is claimed you forget your sorrows in drink, but from what I can see, men in their cups will in fact weep to recall their past unhappiness. As for the next world-having lost the wisdom you were born with, reduced all your good karma to ashes, built up a store of wickedness and broken all the Buddhist precepts you are destined for hell. Remember that Buddha teaches those that lift the wine glass either to their own lips or others’ will spend five hundred lifetimes without hands.”

Yoshida Kenkō, “A Cup of Sake Beneath the Cherry Trees”, 1329-1331?

RKS Literature: The Evil Side of Sake (Yoshida Kenkō)

“I cannot understand why people will seize any occasion to immediately bring out the sake, delighting in forcing someone else to drink. The other will frown and grimace in painful protest, attempt to throw it away when no one’s looking or do his best to escape, but this man will seize him, pin him down and make him swallow cup after cup. A genteel man will be quickly transformed into a madman and start acting the fool; a vigorous, healthy fellow will before your very eyes become shockingly afflicted and fall senseless to the floor. What a thing to do, on a day of celebration. Right into the next day his head hurts, he can’t eat, and he lies there groaning with all memory of the previous day gone as if it were a former life.”

Yoshida Kenkō, “A Cup of Sake Beneath the Cherry Trees”, 1329-1331?

RKS Poetry Anthology (All We Get Are The Coffee Grinds):”EVENING MANAGEMENT CLASSES”

EVENING MANAGEMENT CLASSES

Upper middle class and more suburban sniffers

Assemble after work

Haunted by prospects of lower-class blues

Fired by ambitious dreams

Ontological drama forgotten

In the dance of dollars

The future manager shines like the Star of Bethlehem steel

Clamouring to understand the techniques of worker manipulation

And win that Delta 88

Respect, dignity

Wholesome men of the community

Not even the imported Italian cologne masks the smell of their

Robert K. Stephen

“Lost in Puppydom: Rory Dylan Stephen’s Puppydom”: ONE SMALL STEP FOR RORY A HUGE LEAP FOR MANKIND: HEALING POST TRAUMATIC WESTIE STRESS DISORDER (PTWSD)

ONE SMALL STEP FOR RORY A HUGE LEAP FOR MANKIND: HEALING POST TRAUMATIC WESTIE STRESS DISORDER (PTWSD)

I might have revised the title of this chapter to read “ONE SMALL STEP FOR MANKIND A HUGE LEAP FOR RORY”.

You may recall in an early chapter I told you readers about being chased around the garden close to midnight in minus 18-degree weather. Bob was wearing a coat over his pyjamas with the snow outside up to his knees. I was having the time of my life. Bob was calling “Rory come!” As I was having so much fun playing chase I decided to hide behind a bush to make the game more exciting! The gentle “Come” became a bit more intense and angrier so I decided make a break for it but was nabbed by Bob by the scruff of my neck and blasted with a few “BAD DOG” exhortations. The game continued for the next few days in the cold winter freeze and Bob put a leash on me prior to placing me outside. He could grab the leash easily and haul me in like a fish on the line. The chase lost its excitement. With a hundred practices with the Come Command I did it! I came! I slink like a cheetah on the hunt and when proximate to Bob I jump in the air towards him. Not as much fun as the chase but preferable to angry exhortations!

Bob says his stressful and traumatic midnight romps in frigidity caused him PTWSD substantially raising his blood pressure, whatever that means. Bottom line I receive much praise and some warm hugs and a treat for following the Come Command. I am not perfect as to Come Command adherence, but I sense Bob, Mankind and Rory are all the better for it. Puppyhood is so easy…..sometimes.

RKS Literature: A Friend of Marlon Brando Comments on His Choice of Friends (Truman Capote)

“….the kind of people he didn’t like-and the kind he did, both-stemmed from his insecurities. His inferiority feelings. Very few of his friends were his equals- anybody he’d have to compete with if you know what I mean. Mostly they were strays, idolizers, characters who were dependent on him one way or another. The same with the girls he took out. Plain sort of somebody’s secretary type girls-nice enough but nothing that’s going to start a stampede of competitors”.

Truman Capote, “The Duke in His Domain”, 1957.