SPOOF Movie Review: “DOGE Days Afternoon”: Moron Tusk Stars in a Confusing Epic of Bravado, Ego and Banality: To the Septic Tank Age

“DOGE Days Afternoon” hits the screens at the French River Film Festival in New Jersey tomorrow.

It is the tale, and a woeful one at that, about “an off-centre man” a renowned industrialist Horatio Alger, Moron Tusk (Tony Tesla) holding the United States hostage by destroying its governmental apparatus for the pure pleasure of exercising his destructive power with gay abandon. With the blessing of a rogue president, Oran Crapaud (Zane Zempic),he rampages unchecked closing down governmental agencies paralyzing a country masking his destructive delights with rationalizations of efficiency replete with comparisons of the entire governmental bureaucracy as corrupt and fraudulent convincing himself and his tag team of monkey see monkey do Pubican Party lackies of his righteous mission of propelling the United States  into the “Septic Tank Age” where darkness, must and sewage permeates the spirit of the United States.

Tesla, as Tusk, is brilliant conveying credibility and madness in the same breath yet like the amateur bank robber Al Pacino in “Dog Day Afternoon” his soul is wreaked with confusion despite the apparent “aura of correctness”.

The torrid love interest of Tesla, Suzy Larue (Cloudly Daniels) a former hostess at a satanic pizza parlour in Washington D.C., illustrates Tusk thrives on domination. Forgetting Larue’s birthday is exemplary of his depravity.

Reminiscent of the 2023 British film “Zone of Interest”, “DOGE Days Afternoon” feasts on the concept that the destructive force of pure evil is simply a way of life for Tusk without him realizing he is the poster boy of evil. The theme of “DOGE Days Afternoon” is destruction of communities and families in the name of a contrived and fictional ideology masked by the concept of the public good.

The directorial debut here of Ronny Runthauser, a former Fox News custodian, is a confused disaster for the most part. We are puzzled why a plane crash killing dozens of innocent passengers serves as a very bad taste gleeful justification to dismantle the Federal Aviation Agency. Tusk derives power from negativity. Leech on the negativity like a remora to a shark and Tusk is there exploiting it. Runthauser fails to connect the DOGE dots as the reason for creation of a national paralysis is a justification for a seizure of power by you know who. If at first he didn’t succeed try again!

Runthauser has successfully created a study of Tusk, a man who fights “corruption and fraud” being morally corrupt and fraudulent himself although one questions if this is by accident or intentional. 

Whether this film goes further than the French River, New Jersey is anyone’s guess. SPOOF Culture has received word the Grand Council of MAGA is debating whether to boycott the movie, have Runthauser arrested for treason or simply to burn down any theatre screening the film in the spirit of Kristallnacht in a bid to make America Great Again in the Septic Tank Age.

President Donald Trump Suffers Ear Injury Caused by Late Night Chicken Bone Scuffle: Spoof News Services: Washington: 22February2025:

At 2 a.m. Washington time this morning a scuffle broke out in a Presidential garage abutting the White House.

A Republican Guard Patrol, successor to the disbanded Secret Service, and a MAGA Patriot Patrol converged simultaneously upon a suspicious figure hunched over in a menacing manner oohing and awing licking greasy fingers. Both patrols collided with each trying to apprehend the fleeing suspect. In the melee the suspect, clutching a sharp object fell to the ground piercing his ear.

The suspect was none other than President Donald J. Trump. Sources say he snuck out of the White House and accepted an Uber delivery of Kentucky Fried Chicken at the White House gates then had hidden near the garage scoffing the wings and drumsticks when he was apprehended. With President Trump’s pieced ear initially appearing to be a fatal injury as a caution Jimbo Nochance was quickly sworn in as the next President of the United States having to push away Moron Tusk desperately wanting to be the new President.

The President is well and comfortably resting. The chicken bone will be removed later at the Walter Weed Hospital by chief surgeon Dr. Canna Bis.

RKS 2025 Canadian Wine: Mastronardi 2021 Merlot Cabernet Offers an Escape from Niagara Imperialism

If you are looking to buy Canadian wine here in Ontario on a Liquor Commission Board of Ontario Vintages bi-monthly release the bias (if not obsession) is for wines produced in the Niagara region. Tokenism is extended to wines from Prince Edward County and Lake Erie North Shore and as for wines from British Columbia, Quebec and Nova Scotia dream on.

Mastronardi Wines is in the Lake Erie North Shore wine producing region of Ontario.

We try a Mastronardi 2021 Merlot Cabernet and note with a hem and haw the wine is VQA Ontario and not VQA Lake Erie North Shore. Please don’t tell me the wine is made from gapes trucked in from Niagara!

Aroma: One senses a preponderance of Merlot in the blend with a rather lush aroma with loads of black cherry and lesser amounts of blackberry and blueberry.

Palate: Light but broad tannins with a solid jolt of black cherry complimented by blueberry and cassis with a smidge of milk chocolate. Moderately long finish.

Personality: I am proof with skillful use of oak a Merlot/Cabernet Sauvignon blend can be appealing. Unlike many Ontario Merlot/Cabernets I won’t disappoint. I am also a fine sipper in addition to a wonderful accompaniment with food.

Food Match: Haddock or Cod Japanese curry.

Cellarbility: Drinking window closes mid 2027.

Price: $19 CDN.

RKS 2025 Canadian Wine Rating: 90/100.

(Mastronardi Estate Winery 2021 Merlot Cabernet, VQA Ontario, Mastronardi Estate Winery, Kingsville, Ontario, 750 mL, 14%).

Vancouver’s 20th Annual GEMFest Film Festival: “Saigon Kiss”: Much Not Said and Much Not Done Imbued with Massive Tension and Mystery!

“Saigon Kiss” might be misleading in that Saigon no longer exists having being renamed Ho Chi Minh City after the fall of South Vietnam. And there is a kiss but not quite the one you might expect and maybe even deserve with all the tension leading up to a moment that does not happen.

Ho Chi Minh City is a city of a never-ending flow of scooters and motorcycles and you witness that in the film. Quite a miracle I was not run over the last time I was there.

Mo (Nguyen Va Truc) cruises along in her motorcycle refusing to answer her phone. It would appear she is trying to escape an unpleasant call. She assists Vicky (Thuong Le) at the side of the road with a conked-out scooter. A random encounter becomes  what one senses may be a journey, possibly life changing.

Pay close attention to this Vietnamese 22-minute short film and it all becomes more beautiful at its conclusion. Sizzling anticipation so marvellously captured. 

Directed by Hong Anh Nguyen.

Playing 6March2025 at 13:00hrs at VIFF as a Canadian premiere part of the Hatch Short Programme.

The 20th anniversary of GEMFest champions women in film and gender diverse films.

RKS 2025 Film Rating 92/100.

Amy Pickenbobber Released in Rights to Water Swap Deal: Spoof News Services: Pico Island, Portuguese Azores: 21February2025

Amy Pickenbobber the Grade One student from Guelph, Ontario who was last seen being escorted from the Toronto Blue Jays training camp in Dunedin Florida by a MAGA Patriot Squad on 10January2025 to a waiting military airplane and transported to the Guantanamo Bay Naval Base was released today walking down the passenger ramp of a TU-134 Cubana Airways charter flight that landed Pickenbobber at the Pico Island Airport in the Portuguese Azores. She was greeted by her sobbing parents, the Mayor of Guelph Billy Bunion and the 15th Scottish Highland Infantry bagpipe band.

In return for Pickenbobber all water rights in Concession #156 of the Township of Guelph were ceded to Steve Bannon’s “Always in Hot Water” water bottling company.

The Canadian government will seek in court to annul the deed of transfer as against public order” categorizing the transfer of Pickenbobber to Guantanamo Bay as a kidnapping. The Office of MAGA Patriot Squad Control and the Secretary of Homeland Paranoia of the United States, Cristal Numbhead, referred to Pickenbobber’s journey to Guantanamo Bay as a “inter-nations” quarantine justified by Pickenbobber’s contact with the highly transmissible Bluejayosis as permitted under the United States “Quarantine Act for Foreigners”. The United States government denies any involvement in the inter-nations transfer of Pickenbobber instead referring all questions to The Office of MAGA Patriot Squad Control.

It is reported the Pickenbobber’s have negotiated a movie deal with Keanu Reeves production Company JWick based in Hamilton, Ontario.

RKS Literature: The Unreal of Wasted Effort (Yasunari Kawabata)

“Though he was an idler who might as well spend his time in the mountains as anywhere, he looked upon mountain climbing as almost a model of wasted effort. For that reason it pulled at him with the attraction of the unreal.”

Yasunari Kawabata, “Snow Country”, 1956

Tentative Deal to End Ukraine Conflict Found in McDonalds’ Toilet Stall in Riyadh: It is a SHOCKER!: Spoof News Services: 25February2025

(SPOOF EXCLUSIVE)

Our reporting team at the Saudi Arabian meetings to end the Ukraine conflict has unearthed what appears to be a tentative outline of a peace plan. Our Spoof team found the plan handwritten on looseleaf fullscap on the floor of a toilet stall at a McDonalds on King Pooba Street in Riyadh. A courier for the United States government on his way from the central meeting room stopped for a Double Camel Cheeseburger and a date shake at the McDonalds and unused to foreign food had a violent case of the runs running to the toilet moaning and groaning enveloped by great clouds of fetid gas and fumes. In his despair, his stupefaction from the gas and violent contortions a very important  paper must have fallen out of his possession and was located by the Spoof team.

The handwritten notes, unfortunately splattered with human waste including date pits, fully explain the reasoning behind the attendance of the Turkish, Israeli, North Korean and Peoples Republic of China delegation. Here is what Spoof makes of its find.

The United States of America

  • Ceases all funding of the Ukrainian War of Aggression against Russia
  • The remainder of Ukraine not ceded to Russia becomes a state of the United States
  • United States pulls out of NATO
  • Gaza to become a state of the United States with exclusive rights of Kushner Real Estate Corporation to develop a new riviera
  • Canada to house approximately 2,600,000 former residents of Gaza in its Northwest Territories; Possible sending of Chinese Uyghur Muslims to the Canadian province of Newfoundland based on the “Come From Away” principle
  • Zelensky to be sent to exile in Haiti
  • Grants free trade/no tariff access to the United States to Russia
  • Withdraws from the United Nations

The Russian Federation

  • Receives all of Crimea
  • Pays for the reconstruction of Crimea
  • Receives all Russian assets seized during the Ukrainian conflict
  • Receives free trade access to United States markets
  • Withdraws from the United Nations
  • Will be able to establish 4 teams in the National Hockey League

The Peoples Republic of China

  • Receives Taiwan without interference from Russia or the United States
  • Withdraws from the United Nations

Israel

  • Receives West Bank
  • Sends all West Bankers to work at Gaza Riviera properties as caddies at golf courses, restaurant staff and amusement park managers
  • Withdraws from the United Nations

Turkey

  • With assistance of the United States receives 7 Greek islands in the Eastern Aegean to become part of Turkey
  • Agrees to permit the Russian Federation to establish 4 military bases in Turkey
  • Withdraws from NATO

North Korea

  • Permitted to establish a National Basketball team in the United States
  • Exclusive rights to establish dog farms in select locations in Crimea and establish “Hot Dog” fast food restaurants in Moscow, Istanbul, Gaza Riviera, Tel Aviv and Puerto Rico

Spoof reminds readers what is found on the floor may not be worth a hill of beans but we are on the story ahead of everyone as usual.

President Donald Trump Speaks to All 50 States Concerning the Ebola Outbreak: Spoof News Services: Rectum, Connecticut: 20February2025

The Ebola outbreak with a ground zero thought to be the The Toronto Blue Jays spring training camp in Dunedin, Florida has roared out of Florida with cases and fatalities being reported in Texas, Alabama, Arkansas, Missouri and Louisiana.  

Official United States governmental sources have pointed to Amy Pickenbobber, (pictured here at The Municipal Pool in Guantanamo Bay) a Canadian first grader visiting her idols The Toronto Blue Jays at the ballpark in Dunedin as being ground zero for “Bluejayosis” as President Trump has referred to the Ebola disease. Victims hemorrhage to death and die writhing in a pool of blood. Pickenbobber is currently a guest of the United States at VIP accommodations at the United States Naval Base in Guantanamo Bay. Apparently hostage exchange negotiations are currently underway between Canadian and American governmental officials.

President Donald Trump, currently enjoying a vacation with Russian President Vlad Putin on the Black Sea convened a hasty press conference to praise the outbreak’s beneficial effect on strengthening the Golden Age. He stated in part, “Canadians have started this very bad flu, Bluejayosis, in Dunedin Florida using a cute and supposedly innocent first grader Pickenburger and a can of flu bug germs hidden in a can of Canada Dry Gingerale to spread disease throughout the United States. Pickenburger is where she should be as a untrustworthy alien enjoying American hospitality at our Marine base in Squatanamo Bay. Americans need not fear. We went through the Spanish Flu here in 1967 wreaked upon us by a Mexican grape picker Caesar Chavez. The flu only makes Americans stronger through improving genetics. Those who survive this flu pass on their stronger genes to future cadres of the Golden Age. The weak will not survive. The strong are the core of our Golden Age. Our leading Secretary of Health Rob Bubblehead has advised me to treat this flu as anything more serious is an attempt by left wingers to discredit my administration and denigrate the work of my Special Advisor Moron Tusk who has rationalized the health bureaucracy in the United States by eliminating it. We should follow his recommendation of avoiding the wearing of masks, washing hands and  visiting wet markets and instead make yourself a cup of hot tea with two ounces of Tennessee bourbon and going to bed early.”

Spoof News Services: Turkish, North Korean and Israeli Delegations Arrive at Saudi Arabian Ukraine Peace Talks: 20February2025

Delegations from Israel, North Korea and Turkey have arrived in Riyadh. It is uncertain what role they have in relation to the settlement of the Ukrainian conflict. The Saudi Arabian Foreign Ministry acknowledged not only the presence of these delegations but the earlier arrival of a delegation from the People’s Republic of China they initially had stated were Chinese businessmen investigating the possibility of establishing a chain of Chinese restaurants in the Kingdom. No answer was given by Saudi officials as to why these delegations had arrived.

In a press conference this morning President Donald Trump said only, “Get ready for a deal baby. I love a deal. America loves to watch me dealing.”

A small group of anti-Russian demonstrators, Greek students on a exchange programme were seen outside The Hilton Desert Inn in Riyadh where many of the American and Russian delegation were staying. Sources say they were rounded up and have yet to be heard from. The Saudi Foreign Ministry stated the group were most likely fossil fuel haters and to hate fossil fuel is an affront to the King subject to beheading.

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Wine: KEW Vineyards Marches to the Cabernet Drum

A blend of 38% Cabernet Franc, 35% Cabernet Sauvignon and 27% Merlot. 13% of the blend was dried out in the appassimento fashion. Matured in French oak for 18 months.

Aroma: You can certainly discern slight richness in the aroma imparted by the appassimento influenced portion of the blend giving the wine a richness it would not otherwise have. Black cherry rules the roost with black currant, blueberry and vanilla.

Palate: Despite some of the richness on the nose the palate presents itself as stern hiding its fruit. Grippy tannins in that they cling lightly to the palate. Blackberry and cassis. Short and austere finish.

Personality: On my nose you might think of me as a softy but as far as marching I am a tough Canadian Highlander.

Food Match: Built for food and not sipping. Meaty pizza or Pasta a la Norma.

Cellarbility: Will tramp into 2027 nicely.

Price: $21 CDN.

RKS 2025 CANADIAN Wine Rating: 88/100. Natalie MacLean Community Score 88.

(Kew Vineyards 2020 Soldier’s Grant, VQA Niagara Peninsula, KEW Vineyards Estate Winery, Beamsville, Ontario, 750 mL 14.5%).